How to Move On After a Breakup: A Guide to Coping Strategies and What Not to Do
Breakups can be tough. Whether you were the dumper or the dumpee, it’s hard to let go of someone you once cared for deeply.
But if you’re reading this article, it means you’re ready to move forward and start a new chapter in your life. Congratulations, you’re one step closer to healing! In this article, we’ll discuss coping strategies that can help you move on, as well as things you should avoid doing after a breakup.
Things Not to Do After a Breakup
1. Contacting Your Ex
One of the most common mistakes people make after a breakup is trying to get in touch with their ex.
You might feel the urge to reach out to them to get some closure, ask them questions, or simply say hello. But communication can be a slippery slope, especially if the relationship ended badly.
Instead of trying to reconnect, give yourself some space and time to heal.
2. Leaving Communication Open
On the flip side, it’s also crucial not to leave communication open with your ex. This means cutting off all forms of contact, including social media, emails, and texts.
It’s natural to want to check in on your ex, but doing so will only prolong your healing process. It’s better to create some distance and move on with your life.
3. Stalking Social Media
With the rise of social media, it’s easy to become obsessed with your ex’s life post-breakup.
You might feel tempted to scroll through their Instagram or Facebook page, just to see what they’ve been up to. But resist the urge! Seeing pictures of your ex with their new flame or enjoying life without you will only hurt you more.
4. Remaining Friends on Social Media
If you can’t resist stalking your ex’s pages, then it’s probably best to unfriend or unfollow them.
Staying connected on social media will only serve as a constant reminder of your past relationship. Give yourself some time and space to heal, and focus on your own growth instead.
5. Asking Mutual Friends About Your Ex
It’s understandable to have questions about your ex, especially if the breakup was sudden or unexpected.
But asking mutual friends about them will only stir up old feelings and make it harder for you to move on. Instead, try to focus on yourself and your own journey.
6. Stalking and Comparing to Their New Partner
As mentioned earlier, stalking your ex on social media can lead to comparing yourself to their new partner.
It’s important to remember that everyone moves on at their own pace, and it’s not a competition. Comparing yourself to others will only hurt your self-worth and self-esteem.
7. Staying Miserable
It’s easy to get stuck in a cycle of sadness and self-pity after a breakup.
But wallowing in your misery won’t help you move on. Instead, try to find healthy ways to cope, like talking to a therapist, leaning on friends and family for support, or finding a new hobby.
8. Pretending to Be Okay
On the opposite end of the spectrum, pretending to be okay when you’re not is also not healthy.
Accept that rejection hurts, and that it’s okay to feel sad or angry. Give yourself permission to grieve the end of your relationship and take the time you need to heal.
9. Trying to Be Friends with Your Ex
While it’s possible to remain friends with an ex, it’s important to give yourself some space before attempting to do so.
A toxic relationship won’t benefit either party, and staying friends out of guilt or obligation will only hurt you more. Instead, take some time to focus on yourself, and if you’re ready, you can re-evaluate the possibility of friendship down the line.
10. Letting the Breakup Affect Your Work
It’s understandable to feel distracted or emotional at work after a breakup.
But letting the breakup affect your job performance will only make things worse. Consider talking to a counselor or therapist if you find yourself struggling to focus at work.
Coping Strategies After a Breakup
1. Socializing
After a breakup, it’s important to lean on friends and family for support.
Spending time with loved ones can help boost your mood, alleviate stress, and keep you distracted from negative thoughts. Don’t be afraid to reach out and ask for help!
2. Avoiding Rebound Flings
While it’s tempting to jump into a new relationship right away, rebound flings rarely end well. Not only can they complicate things further, but they can also be unfair to the other person involved.
It’s better to take some time to heal and focus on self-care before jumping back into the dating game.
3. Believing in Love Again
Just because one relationship didn’t work out doesn’t mean that you’ll never find love again. It’s important to keep a positive attitude and remember that there are plenty of fish in the sea.
Instead of losing hope, remain hopeful and open to finding love in the future.
4. Avoiding Drunk Contact
It’s easy to send a drunk text or call after a few too many drinks. But doing so will only create regret in the morning.
If you know you’re prone to letting loose after a night of drinking, consider limiting your alcohol intake or avoiding it altogether.
5. Avoiding Booty Calls
Post-breakup hookups might seem like a good idea at the time, but they rarely lead to positive outcomes. Instead of compromising your self-respect, take some time to focus on yourself and your own healing process.
6. Spring Cleaning
A breakup is the perfect time to declutter and let go of old possessions that no longer serve a purpose.
Donate clothes, sell old furniture, and clear out your living space. Not only will decluttering your physical space help clear your mind, but it will also give you a sense of control in a time when things might feel chaotic.
7. Avoiding Go-To Places
Going to places that hold special memories with your ex is only going to cause pain.
Instead, try finding new places to explore and make new memories. This will help you break free from the past and focus on the future.
8. Changing the Playlist
Music has a way of triggering emotional responses and memories.
If you find yourself constantly listening to songs that remind you of your ex, it’s time to make a change. Create a new playlist that empowers you and makes you feel good.
9. Not Staying Angry at the World
It’s easy to feel angry or bitter after a breakup.
But holding onto negative emotions will only hurt you in the long run. Instead, try to practice self-love and forgiveness.
Remember that everyone makes mistakes, and that you’re worthy of forgiveness and healing.
10. Seeing the Potential for Happiness
Last but not least, don’t forget about the potential for happiness after a breakup. While it might be hard to see right away, there are endless possibilities for progress and growth.
Use this time to focus on yourself and your own journey, and who knows what amazing things might come your way.
In conclusion, moving on after a breakup is never easy.
But by avoiding these ten things and employing these ten coping strategies, you’ll be on your way to healing and happiness in no time. Remember to be kind to yourself, take things one day at a time, and keep moving forward.
You got this, champ!
In conclusion, breaking up is never fun, but it’s a part of life. While it may feel overwhelming at times, it’s essential to remember that there are healthy ways to cope and move forward.
By avoiding the common mistakes, leaning on support systems, and investing time into self-care, moving on can be an incredibly empowering experience. By following the suggestions outlined above, you can take control of your life, heal, and move on from a relationship that no longer serves you, giving yourself the opportunity to flourish and thrive in the future.
So, remember to be kind to yourself, take things one day at a time, and keep moving forward. You got this!
