Why People Push Love Away
Have you ever experienced a relationship where, for some reason, your partner just pushes you away? It’s not just that they need some space alone, but they actively seem to avoid you and resist giving you any love.
You might be asking yourself, “What am I doing wrong?” The truth is, it may not be about you at all. There are a number of reasons why people push love away.
Some, like fear of commitment and jealousy, are well-known. Others, like complacency and indecisiveness, can be more subtle.
Here are fifteen ways that people might push love away unconsciously:
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Distancing
When someone puts physical or emotional distance between themselves and their partner, it can be a sign that they want to avoid deepening the relationship.
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Rudeness
Being rude and mean-spirited is a good way to push people away.
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Complacency
When someone doesn’t put effort into the relationship, it can feel like they don’t care.
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Public Shaming
Making fun of someone or putting them down in front of others is a great way to humiliate them and make them feel unimportant.
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Critical Behavior
Criticizing your partner repeatedly, whether it’s their actions or their feelings, can make them feel unloved.
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Ignoring Calls/Texts
Regularly ignoring communication from your partner can make them feel like you don’t care about them.
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Displaying Greater Regard for Others
When someone shows more affection or preference for someone else, it can make their partner feel unimportant.
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Nagging
Constantly reminding your partner of all the things they’re not doing right can wear them down and push them away.
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Criticizing in Front of Others
Just like public shaming, criticizing your partner when others are present can be degrading and hurtful.
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Refusing Intimacy
Not wanting to be physically intimate with your partner sends a clear message that you don’t value the relationship.
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Not Fully Participating
If you’re not putting in equal effort or participating fully in the relationship, it’s easy for your partner to feel like you don’t care about them.
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Prioritizing Personal Space
It’s nice to have some alone time, but prioritizing your own space over spending time with your partner can make them feel neglected.
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Being Indecisive
Making decisions can be tough, but if you’re always indecisive, it can be frustrating for your partner and make them feel unimportant.
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Fear of Commitment
Sometimes people push love away because they’re afraid of the commitment that comes with it.
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Excessive Jealousy
While a little bit of jealousy can be cute, if it becomes excessive, it can be a sign of trust issues that can push a partner away.
Why Putting Effort Into Relationships is Important
Maintaining a healthy relationship requires consistent effort from both partners. A relationship can be like a painting or sculpture, where both parties must work together to create a beautiful piece of art.
Here are some reasons why it’s so important to put effort into your relationships:
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Relationship as an artwork in progress
Relationships aren’t something that you can just set on cruise control and expect to be successful. They require regular attention, communication, and effort to thrive.
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Making your partner feel special
Doing small things, like leaving love notes or surprise gestures, can make your partner feel loved and appreciated.
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Basking in the joy and sunshine of love
When everything is going well, it’s important to take a step back and appreciate the love that you have.
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Corrosive elements of a deteriorating bond
Just as too much salt can ruin a dish, corrosive behaviors can quickly break down a healthy relationship. These behaviors include things like rudeness, public shaming, and critical behavior, all of which can erode the bond between partners.
In conclusion, the key to a successful relationship is to minimize the negative behaviors that can push love away and to consistently make an effort to keep the relationship healthy. Remember, relationships are like artwork in progress, and it’s important to treat them with the respect and attention they deserve.
Common Relationship Mistakes: And How to Avoid Them
Relationships are wonderful, but they can also be challenging. Sometimes, even the most loving and well-intentioned couples make mistakes that can lead to problems in the relationship.
In this article, we’re going to explore some of the most common relationship mistakes, and provide tips on how to avoid them.
Ignoring Calls/Texts or Delaying Response
Ignoring your partner’s calls or messages is a huge red flag in any relationship.
Not only does it lead to feelings of distance and disconnection, but it can also create anxiety and insecurity. Similarly, delaying a response for no good reason can create unnecessary tensions.
Couples who ignore or delay responding do so for many reasons. Sometimes, they are too caught up in their own lives, and they see their partner as an interruption.
Other times, they may be using it as a way to control or manipulate their partner. The key to avoiding this mistake is making sure that you are creating your own space and boundaries, and initiating honest communication with your partner.
If you’re too busy to talk, let your partner know, and make a commitment to get back to them at a specific time. Be willing to communicate and make adjustments as necessary.
Displaying Greater Regard for Others
In relationships, it’s important to remember that everything you do and say is a reflection of the value you place on the relationship. If you’re constantly putting others ahead of your partner, or making petty comments, this can be a sign of disrespect.
We all have our moments of selfishness, but there’s a tipping point where it becomes harmful to the relationship. Be mindful of your behavior and ask yourself how your partner might feel.
It’s important to be supportive and loving, and if you feel yourself struggling with this, try taking a step back and reflecting on what your partner means to you.
Nagging and Criticizing in Front of Others
Nagging and criticizing your partner can be a toxic mistake that can create deep wounds and lead to emotional abuse. Whether you do it in private or in front of others, it can feel like a public shaming and cause lasting damage.
If you find yourself constantly pointing out negative aspects of your partner, try to focus on the positive instead. Celebrate your partner’s wins, and try to be more mindful of how you’re communicating.
Be willing to have difficult conversations when necessary, but make sure that they remain private, and that you’re not gaslighting or blowing up over minor disagreements.
Refusing Intimacy on Flimsy Premises
Sexual intimacy is a crucial part of any relationship, and refusing it can be harmful and make your partner feel unwanted or unloved. However, there are times when intimacy might be challenging due to stress, hormonal changes, or other reasons.
If you’re feeling like you need space, let your partner know what’s going on so that they don’t feel like you’re rejecting them. Try to find a middle path that works for both of you, and don’t use intimacy as leverage in your arguments.
Not Fully Participating
It’s important to remember that relationships require effort and input from both parties. If you’re always putting your own needs ahead of your partner’s, or harping on about personal space, this can be a sign of selfishness.
Make sure you’re investing in the relationship, and are willing to make compromises when necessary. Reflect on how your behavior might be affecting your partner and do your best to show up and fully participate.
Being Indecisive
Being indecisive can be frustrating for your partner and lead to mixed signals. It can also be a sign of unrealistic expectations or a fear of commitment.
Try to be clear with your partner about what you want and how you feel. Avoid trying to read their minds or making assumptions, and don’t run away from love just because you’re afraid of getting hurt.
Being Too Jealous
Jealousy is a normal human emotion, and a little bit can make relationships feel exciting. However, when it becomes excessive, it can lead to controlling behaviors and trust issues.
Make sure you’re communicating your feelings with your partner, and are doing your best to manage your own emotions. Remember that jealousy can be both healthy and unhealthy, and make sure that yours isn’t getting the best of you.
Need for Control
The need for control is a common mistake that can ruin relationships. It can lead to abusive behavior and make your partner feel like they can’t be themselves.
If you find yourself struggling with control issues, try to get help. Consider seeking therapy or counseling, and be willing to examine your behavior and make changes.
Inability to Resolve Conflict
Conflict is a natural part of any relationship, and how you deal with it can make or break the bond. Avoiding conflict or resorting to silent treatments or sulking can create a ticking time bomb that can lead to ugly fights.
Make sure you’re communicating openly and honestly with your partner, and that you’re willing to compromise when necessary. Try to avoid anger and drama, and instead focus on the positive aspects of the relationship.
Lack of Hygiene
Personal hygiene is important, and failing to maintain it can create hygiene mistakes that can harm your relationship. Make sure you’re taking care of yourself, and are aware of any smelly body parts.
Similarly, be mindful of sexual hygiene and make sure that you’re keeping yourself clean.
Giving Too Much Priority to Family
Giving too much priority to family can create problems in your relationship. Whether you’re a mama’s boy or are always putting family first, it can make your partner feel left out and unimportant.
Remember that your relationship is also important, and that it requires investment and focus. Make sure you’re creating a balance between your family and your partner, and that you’re not neglecting your relationship.
Fear of Relationship Ending
The fear of the relationship ending is a common experience that can lead to self-sabotage and pushing love away. If you’re struggling with low self-esteem, try to focus on the positive aspects of yourself and your relationship.
Remember that relationships require effort and commitment, but that they can also be a source of joy and love. By avoiding these common relationship mistakes and making an effort to nurture your relationship, you can avoid unnecessary conflicts and maintain a healthy bond that will last for years to come.
In conclusion, relationships require effort and commitment from both partners, and common mistakes can create unnecessary tensions and conflicts that can harm the bond. Ignoring calls/texts, showing greater regard for others, nagging, refusing intimacy on flimsy premises, not fully participating, being indecisive, excessive jealousy, the need for control, inability to resolve conflict, lack of hygiene, giving too much priority to family, and fear of relationship ending are common relationship mistakes that can be avoided.
By being mindful and investing time and effort into nurturing a loving relationship, couples can build a strong bond that will last for years to come. The key is to communicate openly, make compromises when necessary, and treat the relationship with the respect and attention it deserves.
