7 Unrealistic Expectations Modern Marriages Can’t Live Up To

Working On the Marriage

The Significance of Modern Marriages

Hey there, are you one of those lucky ones who have found the love of their life and are planning to get married soon? Or are you someone who is already married and is looking to reaffirm your belief in the importance of your bond?

Whatever your situation may be, one thing is for sure – modern marriages are significant in so many ways!

1) Importance of a Support System

Marriage is not just about two people living together under the same roof, it is also about finding a support system in each other. When you are in a marriage, you have someone who has got your back through thick and thin.

Whether it is during tough times, when you need someone to lean on, or just when you need a listening ear, your spouse is there to be that pillar of strength for you.

2) Daunting Task of Cementing the Bond

Building and cementing a strong bond in a modern marriage is not an easy task. It requires effort and commitment from both partners.

From learning to communicate effectively to understanding each other’s emotional needs, there are so many challenges that come with modern marriages. And yet, when you put in the work and come out on the other side, the bond that you create is unbreakable.

3) Promises of Exclusivity

Exclusivity is another important aspect of modern marriages. When you exchange wedding vows, you are promising to love and cherish one another in sickness and in health, for as long as you both shall live.

This promise of exclusivity is a powerful one, and it forms the foundation of any strong and healthy marriage.

4) Difficulty in Dealing with Infidelity

However, despite the promises made during the wedding ceremony, infidelity is still a harsh reality in modern marriages. The pain and hurt that comes with dealing with infidelity can be devastating, and it can take years to heal from the wounds caused by an unfaithful partner.

But with help and support from family, friends and even counselors, it is possible to move forward and rebuild a broken marriage.

5) The Evolution of Marriage and Betrayal

Marriage has come a long way from what it used to be. Back in the day, societal beliefs were different, and marriage was viewed as a lifelong commitment that was not to be taken lightly.

But as society evolved, these beliefs changed, and marriage became more about individualism and social aspirations.

6) Breakdown of Family Values

With these changes came a breakdown of family values. The once-held belief that marriage was sacred and something that required hard work and commitment was tossed to the wayside.

People began to view marriage as just another form of relationship that could be easily discarded if things were not working out.

7) Imbalance Between Individualism and Social Aspirations

The imbalance between individualism and social aspirations is another reason why modern marriages are facing many challenges. With social media and the internet, people have access to a broader range of opportunities and experiences than ever before.

This has made it difficult for some people to find satisfaction in their marriages, as they are constantly searching for more and better things outside of their relationship.

8) Utopian Ideal of Eternal Fidelity

However, despite these challenges, many still hold on to the utopian ideal of eternal fidelity and commitment in their marriages. For them, marriage is not just another relationship, but a lifelong journey that is bound by love, trust, and commitment.

In conclusion, modern marriages are significant in so many ways. They offer a sense of security and support that cannot be found in any other relationship.

But they also come with their own set of challenges, which require effort and commitment from both partners. However, if you are willing to put in the work, the rewards that come with building a strong and healthy marriage are invaluable.

3) Personalizing Infidelity

Infidelity is a topic that has been around for centuries, and yet, in modern times, it still remains a controversial and taboo subject. For those who have been betrayed, the experience can be devastating and all-consuming, leading to feelings of personal failure, unmet expectations, and broken trust.

Let’s take a closer look at the ways in which infidelity can become personalized and the impact it can have on those involved.

1) Perception of Personal Failure

When someone cheats on their partner, the betrayed partner can often feel as though they have failed personally and that the infidelity was somehow their fault. They might begin to question their own attractiveness, intelligence, or worth as a partner.

This perception of failure can also lead to a drop in self-confidence, feelings of low self-worth and in some cases, depression.

2) Trust Issues After Breaking Vows

Infidelity can shatter the trust that has been built up between two partners over years, perhaps decades, leading to trust issues and a sense of betrayal. It can be hard to gain that trust back, and even more challenging to build on it after it has been broken.

3) Suspicion of Other Values and Abilities

The hurt and betrayal caused by infidelity can also lead to suspicion of other values and abilities that the betrayed partner holds dear. For instance, before the affair, they might have trusted their partner as a provider, a confidante or a friend.

But after the discovery of their partner’s infidelity, they may begin to doubt these aspects of their partner’s character as well, leading to a loss of faith in other aspects of their relationship.

4) Infidelity as a Human Transgression

As much as we might like to believe that infidelity is something that only happens to certain people, in certain circumstances, the truth is that it is a human transgression that can happen to anyone. And, while not all infidelities are caused by the same underlying factors, there are some broad reasons why people cheat.

So then, how can we deal with infidelity on a personal level within marriages? The best way to approach the issue is to bring the necessary support system in place, both internally and externally within the relationship.

As an individual, it’s essential to get a hold of the intense emotions that are likely to come along with the pain of betrayal. This process involves becoming aware of the emotions and identifying them, so that they can be better managed.

In addition, external support from therapists or family can be a viable way of processing the implications of infidelity on a deeper level.

4) The Cultural Influence on Marriage

Marriage is often seen as a universal constant throughout cultures and time, and yet, the way in which societies approach marriage can differ widely. In this section, we will explore how cultural influences shape our perceptions of marriage and the dynamics within it.

1) The Western Influence

The Western influence on marriage is unmistakable. The idea of romantic love as the foundation of marriage has been exported around the world through Hollywood movies, television programs, and novels.

The Western idea of marriage promotes intimacy, individuality, and self-actualization, which we now see in marriages all around the globe.

2) Individualistic Assertion

An important cultural influence on modern marriage is individualistic assertion. This is the idea that individuals have the right to decide for themselves what they want in life, including whom they marry or how they choose to live their lives.

With individualism comes a sense of self-actualization and a focus on personal fulfillment within the marriage.

3) Consciousness of Individual Position

Today, many couples are cautious of individual positions which may be harmful to the marriage. They typically consider individual behavior and actions within their marriage in order to understand how they affect their spouse.

This consciousness of the individual position can lead to more powerful partnerships within the relationship. Society as a United “Us”

4) Society as a United “Us”

Another cultural influence that impacts modern marriage is society’s perception of marriage as a united “us.” In contrast to more individualistic cultures, many societies view marriage as a collective commitment in which the needs and wants of the family unit are of paramount concern.

In such cultures, the greater good takes precedence over the needs of the individual. In conclusion, culture and infidelity play a significant role in modern-day marriages.

Personalizing infidelity can lead to a realization of how a betrayal can affect ones self-esteem and belief in the relationship. Also, culture provides a foundation upon which marriage is defined and culturally nuanced.

As these discussions continuously unfold, understanding both of these concepts allows us to explore healthy relationships, particularly in how we respond to expectations.

5) Unrealistic Expectations in Modern Marriages

Modern marriages come with the burden of so many expectations that can be challenging to meet. While love, commitment and shared values are essential to a happy marriage, modern expectations often go beyond this.

In this section, we will look closer at what these unrealistic expectations are, their impact and what can be done to manage them.

1) Sexual Attraction and Romance Wane

One of the most unrealistic expectations that modern marriages face is the idea that sexual attraction and romance should never wane, even after years or decades of being together. Society promotes romantic love as the foundation of marriage, perpetuating the belief that intense sexual attraction and romantic love are supposed to last forever.

The truth is, however, that the intensity of sexual attraction and romance typically wane over time as the couple settles in and gains comfort and familiarity with each other.

2) Pressure from Societal Expectations

Modern marriages face immense pressure from societal expectations. There’s an expectation to be successful, to have a perfect home and kids, a loving and attentive partner, and the time and resources for personal activities, hobbies, and dreams.

With these standards in mind, it is easy for couples to feel overwhelmed and unable to meet them.

3) Billion-Dollar Industry Invested in Marriage

Marriage is big business. From wedding planners to the premarital counseling industry, many companies have profited from the idea that a perfect marriage equates to the perfect life.

In truth, the best support for a successful marriage is often that which comes organically through a strong partnership, not through a money-driven industry propped up as necessary to one’s marital success.

4) Fixated and Rigid Ideas on Relationships

Finally, fixated and rigid ideas of what relationships ought to be like are also contributing to unrealistic expectations within modern marriages. Society promotes the belief that partners should always be on the same page, hold mutually exclusive opinions, and share all interests and passions.

These preconceived notions limit individuals and hinder them from appreciating their partner fully, while also overlooking reasonable differences that exist between each partner. To manage unrealistic expectations in modern marriage, couples have a responsibility to communicate openly and voice what they are comfortable with and ready to offer their partners.

Marital fulfilment is about compromise, recognizing that each partner does not have to be perfectly aligned in their beliefs or preferences. Couples can together think about the determining values of their marriage that are most important, ones that reflect their individual ideals but still respect the other partner.

In conclusion, the foundation for managing unrealistic expectations is often in the acknowledgement individuals bring to their own belief systems and how their partner’s beliefs will influence the resulting expectations. By cultivating a sense of respect for differences and maintaining healthy communication, modern couples can build a stronger, happier, and more sustainable partnership.

In conclusion, modern marriages are complex relationships that are essential to a happy and fulfilling life. Despite the challenges and unrealistic expectations that come with modern marriages, there are ways to manage and overcome them.

A strong partnership built on love, commitment, and healthy communication is central to a successful marriage. Personalized infidelity and cultural influences both impact modern marriages in different ways, while the idea of unrealistic expectations has become the norm and a billion-dollar industry in and of itself.

By recognizing and managing these factors, modern couples can overcome challenges and maintain strong, sustainable, and fulfilling relationships, regardless of their unique circumstances.

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