How to Get Over a Breakup You Caused
Breaking up is never an easy feat. Whether it is an amicable separation or a messy one, it can still take a toll on your mental and emotional well-being.
But what if you were the cause of your own breakup? Whether it was an intentional mess, cheating, differences, a toxic relationship, or an abusive partner, it can be tough to move on when you feel like it was your fault.
Here are some expert-recommended ways to get over a breakup you caused.
Knowing If Breaking Up Was Your Fault
Before we dive into the ways to get over a breakup, it is imperative to know if breaking up was your fault or not. If you were in a toxic or abusive relationship, it was not your fault.
Your partner had no right to treat you poorly, and you should not carry that burden. However, if you were the one who made the decision to separate because you did not want to put in effort or wanted to control the situation, then it is time to reflect.
Expert-Recommended 9 Ways to Get Over a Breakup You Caused
1. Apologize if the breakup was a mistake
If you realize that the breakup was a mistake or you regret your decision, take the time to apologize.
If there is still a chance to get back together, a heartfelt apology can make a significant difference. However, ensure that you are making a genuine effort, and it is not just your way of mumbling words to get back into the relationship.
2. Don’t doubt your decision if it was not working out
If the relationship was unhealthy, and it was time to end things, do not doubt your decision.
Do not feel guilty that you could not give your ex-partner the fairy-tale ending they hoped for. Remember that relationships are two-way streets, and sometimes things do not work out, and that’s okay.
3. Is it a pattern that you need to break?
If you find yourself constantly walking out of relationships, it could be time to break the pattern. Fear of commitment or deep-seated issues may be affecting your ability to have a healthy relationship.
Consider therapy or a meaningful conversation with a friend or family member.
4. Confess to someone to deal with the guilt
If you are still dealing with guilt over ending things, confess to someone you trust. A friendly therapist or a trusted friend can help you deal with your guilty conscience and shame.
5. Give your partner the required space
If your ex-partner needs space to heal, give them that space.
It shows respect, and it allows you both to move on and eventually be on friendly terms. Remember, healing takes time, and everyone deals with it differently.
6. Learn from this experience
Take this experience as a lesson learned.
Self-restraint, toxic partners, and clear boundaries are essential in any future relationships.
7. Don’t wait for closure to fully get over a breakup
Do not wait for closure to start the healing process. Strongly decide to move on and find personal closure in your life.
Waiting for closure can prevent you from fully recovering and finding happiness.
8. Take a break from dating
Take a break from dating for a while. Focus on your mental health and ensure that you are ready to start dating again without any unresolved feelings.
9. Realize that this is not the end of the world
Lastly, realize that a breakup is not the end of the world.
Poor judgment happens, and everyone makes mistakes. Focus on self-love and your personal goals and priorities.
Time has a way of healing everything.
Is It Your Fault?
When assessing blame in a breakup, it is essential to remember that people change. We are not the same people as we were five years ago.
Your decision to end things might have been due to your evolution as a person. Additionally, if you were in an unhealthy relationship, the fault should not be placed solely on you.
Introspection can help you find justification and lead to a sound state of mind. In conclusion, a breakup can be a painful process, and it is normal to feel guilt and remorse.
However, it is essential to remember that sometimes relationships do not work out for various reasons. Take this as a learning experience and use it to grow as a person.
Remember that your happiness and well-being matter, and taking care of yourself should always be a priority.
Expert Opinion
Life Coach and Counselor Joie Bose
When it comes to breakups, especially those caused by an abusive marriage or extramarital affairs, it can be challenging to move forward. However, with the right support and counseling, anybody can get through it.
That’s where a life coach and counselor like Joie Bose can make a difference. As someone who has been through a painful divorce, Joie understands the pain of breakups and the challenges that come with it.
Her experience has taught her that the most important thing is to be emotionally available to deal with the situation. She believes that before a person can move on, they need to be in a sound state of mind to deal with their emotions.
According to Joie, the first step to dealing with a breakup is understanding the root cause of it. In many cases, individuals blame themselves for the breakup, leading to a cycle of guilt and self-blame.
However, a healthy approach to dealing with a breakup involves understanding that both parties contributed to the relationship ending. Joie adds that dealing with a breakup caused by abusive behavior or infidelity is particularly difficult.
Counseling can help individuals understand their situation, learn coping mechanisms, and develop a positive outlook on life. She provides a safe space for individuals to express themselves and regain their confidence and emotional well-being.
Through her experiences, Joie has learned that every situation holds hope. Even in the darkest of moments, there is always a way to move forward.
By seeking the right support and guidance, individuals can learn to deal with their pain and move forward towards a brighter future.
Conclusion
Dealing with a breakup is a challenging process, and it’s natural to feel overwhelmed with emotions such as guilt, self-blame, and pain. However, with a healthy approach to the situation, individuals can work towards healing and moving forward.
It’s essential to remember that both parties contribute to the breakup, and dealing with it requires understanding and emotional availability. Counseling and seeking support from a life coach like Joie Bose can make a significant difference in dealing with challenging breakups caused by issues such as abusive behavior and infidelity.
Through her experience, Joie has learned that there is always hope for a brighter future, even in the darkest of moments. It’s important to stay positive and remember that no darkness lasts forever.
And even in the dimmest of moments, there are always stars to guide us forward. In conclusion, dealing with a breakup is never easy, especially if you were the cause of it.
Understanding the root cause of the breakup, taking responsibility for your actions, and seeking help when needed can all play a significant role in healing and moving forward. Remember that it’s important to focus on self-love, personal goals, and keeping a positive outlook on life.
Seeking support from experts such as life coaches and counselors can also provide valuable guidance and insight. Finally, even in the darkest of moments, there is always hope for a brighter future.
With the right approach, anyone can overcome the pain of a breakup and find happiness once again.