The Mating Grounds

Approaching Girls at Bars: The Ultimate Dos and Don’ts Guide

Hello there,

Approaching an attractive girl at a bar can be both an exciting and daunting experience. On one hand, you might get the chance to meet someone you really click with.

On the other hand, there’s always the possibility of getting shot down or making a fool of yourself. It’s not easy, but with the right approach, you can significantly increase your chances of success.


First things first, make sure you look your best. You don’t need to be the most attractive guy in the room, but a little grooming and attention to your attire can go a long way in boosting your confidence.

Taking the time to spruce yourself up shows that you care about your appearance and value the girl you’re approaching. Be yourself.

It can be easy to put on a faade or a persona to come across as more interesting, but in reality, being genuine and authentic is much more appealing. Pretending to be someone you’re not just to impress someone will eventually backfire.

So, don’t be afraid to show your true self and let your personality shine. Before approaching a girl, make sure she’s not there with someone else.

This can save you from an awkward situation and show that you respect her and her relationships. Observing her group dynamics can also give you a sense of whether or not she’s approachable in the moment.

Sending over a drink can be seen as an old-school approach, but it’s still a solid gesture. Just make sure to do it in a non-creepy way.

If you’re feeling brave, you can introduce yourself as the sender of the drink and start a conversation. Introduce yourself in a friendly and respectful manner.

Whether you’re being introduced by a friend or making the first move, a polite hello and a smile go a long way in making a good impression. Compliment something other than her looks.

Women tend to get enough superficial compliments about their appearance already. Take the time to notice something unique about her and compliment her on that.

Maybe she has a cool phone case or an interesting piece of jewelry. Make sure she’s not surrounded by friends.

Unless you’re super confident and can navigate group dynamics with ease, it’s usually best to approach a girl when she’s by herself. It’s just easier to have a one-on-one conversation without feeling like you’re interrupting something.

If you’re not quite ready to make a move yet, you can smile at her from afar. It’s a subtle way of showing your interest without being too forward.

Plus, a smile is always a good way to make people feel good.


Telling a girl she’s hot might seem like a compliment, but it often comes across as superficial and shallow. Instead, take the time to notice something unique about her and compliment that.

Approaching a girl when she’s around other guys can be seen as disrespectful and can make things awkward for everyone involved. It’s best to wait until she’s by herself or with girlfriends before making your move.

Getting super drunk before approaching a girl might seem like a good idea in the moment, but in reality, it’s a recipe for disaster. Alcohol can make you say and do things you normally wouldn’t, and you might end up embarrassing yourself.

Using a bad pickup line might seem like a good idea at the time, but in reality, it rarely works. Most girls have heard them all before, and they’re just cheesy and corny.

Instead, start a conversation based on something you noticed about her or ask her about something she’s wearing or doing. Talking about how much money you make might seem impressive, but it often comes across as arrogant and materialistic.

Focus instead on getting to know her and having a good conversation. Talking about yourself only can be a major turn-off for most girls.

Show genuine curiosity and ask questions about her life, interests, and hobbies. Don’t forget that the conversation should be a two-way street.

Being touchy-feely right away is a big no-no. You might think it’s a good way to show your interest, but it can come across as pushy and disrespectful.

Always respect a girl’s personal space and boundaries.

Reasons for Difficulty

The unpredictability of a girl’s motives can be a major factor in making approaching them difficult. It’s often hard to tell what a woman is thinking or feeling, and this can be a barrier to making a move.

Furthermore, there’s a certain social norm that makes it difficult for men to show too much interest right away. Men are often expected to play it cool and not come across as too thirsty or desperate.

This can result in missed opportunities.

Importance of Protocol

To maximize your chances of success when approaching women, it’s important to have a solid protocol. This means having a plan and putting in the effort to follow through on that plan.

By following the dos and don’ts outlined above, you can significantly improve your chances of success. Remember, approaching women isn’t easy, but it’s also not impossible.

With the right approach and mindset, you can increase your chances of meeting someone special. So get out there, look your best, and have fun.

You never know what might happen. Good luck!

In conclusion, approaching a girl at a bar can be a nerve-wracking experience, but with the dos and don’ts outlined above, you can significantly improve your chances of success.

By looking your best, being yourself, observing the situation, and following a solid protocol, you can increase your chances of meeting someone special. Remember, it’s important to be respectful, authentic, and attentive.

By taking the time to genuinely connect with someone, you never know what amazing adventures and experiences may be waiting for you. So, what are you waiting for?

Get out there and start approaching with confidence!

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