Getting Closure with a Narcissist: What You Need to Know
Have you ever been in a relationship with someone who made you feel like the world revolved around them? Someone who never took responsibility for their actions and always blamed others for their problems?
If so, you might have been dealing with a narcissist. Narcissistic personality disorder is characterized by inflated self-importance, attention-seeking, lack of empathy, and the need for constant admiration and attention.
These traits make it difficult to get closure with a narcissist, as they are often focused on maintaining their own self-image and obtaining their own needs, rather than considering the feelings of others. So, how can you get closure with a narcissist?
Here are some tips to help you navigate this difficult situation and move forward.
Understanding Narcissistic Personality Disorder
Before you can begin to get closure with a narcissist, it’s important to understand the signs of narcissistic personality disorder. This disorder can manifest in a variety of ways, but some of the most common signs include:
- Inflated sense of self-importance
- Constant need for attention and admiration
- Lack of empathy for others
- Difficulty accepting criticism or admitting fault
- Exploitation of others for personal gain
- Entitlement and belief that they are special or superior
- Manipulation and controlling behavior
- Envy or resentment towards others
Recognizing these signs can help you understand why it can be so difficult to get closure with a narcissist.
Their need for constant validation and attention makes it hard for them to admit fault or take responsibility for their actions, which can make it challenging to have a constructive conversation about why the relationship ended.
Difficulties in Getting Closure with a Narcissist
One of the main difficulties in getting closure with a narcissist is their need for narcissistic supply. This refers to the attention and admiration they require to feel good about themselves.
In many cases, this need for supply is so strong that the narcissist may go to great lengths to maintain it, even if it means hurting others. Another factor that makes it challenging to get closure with a narcissist is their inability to admit fault.
Narcissists tend to view themselves as perfect and blameless, which means they may minimize or justify their negative behaviors or try to shift the blame onto others. In addition, the narcissist’s approach to closure may be shallow and superficial.
They are unlikely to feel an emotional connection to the relationship or the other person, and may offer only trivial or vague reasoning for why the relationship ended.
Ways to Get Closure with a Narcissist
Although getting closure with a narcissist can be challenging, it is possible. Here are some ways to approach the situation:
Accepting Lack of Closure from the Narcissist
One option is to accept that you may not get closure from the narcissist. Trying to force a conversation or explanation may only lead to frustration and disappointment.
Instead, focus on the truth of the situation and rely on your own personal values and beliefs to move forward.
Creating Internal Closure
Another way to get closure is to create it for yourself. This may involve writing a closure letter to the narcissist (even if you never send it), or releasing negative energy through physical activities like exercise or meditation.
Cutting off All Contact
When dealing with a master manipulator like a narcissist, cutting off all contact may be the best option. This means blocking them from all forms of communication and removing any reminders of them from your life.
This can help you detach emotionally and move on.
Getting Rid of Reminders
Detachment is essential in getting closure. Getting rid of photos, videos, and other mementos can help you detach emotionally from the narcissist.
Taking Time to Grieve
Dealing with a narcissist can be emotionally draining, and it’s important to take time to grieve and process your feelings. This may involve experiencing a range of emotions, including anger, sadness, and confusion.
Shifting Focus to Self
It’s easy to get caught up in the drama of a narcissistic relationship, and as such become mentally exhausted. Shifting focus to prioritize self-love and self-esteem is essential in getting closure.
This means taking care of yourself physically, emotionally, and mentally.
Taking Responsibility for One’s Own Part
Narcissists can be attracted to those who have unresolved childhood trauma.
Taking responsibility for your part in the relationship can help you identify patterns and behaviors that may have contributed to the situation.
Seeking Help from Friends and Family
Having a strong support system is crucial in managing stress and mental health crises. Reach out to trusted friends and family to help you navigate the situation and provide emotional support.
Learning about Narcissistic Personality Disorder
Education is key in getting closure from any abusive relationship. Take time to learn about narcissistic personality disorder so you can avoid future relationships with narcissists.
Seeking Professional Help
Dealing with the aftermath of a narcissistic relationship can be incredibly difficult, and seeking professional help can provide validation, support, and guidance on how to move forward and address any damage that may have been caused.
Being Patient with Oneself
Healing from a narcissistic relationship takes time. Be patient with yourself and take it one day at a time.
Remember that closure is a process, and it’s okay to take the time you need to heal and move forward. In conclusion, getting closure with a narcissist can be challenging, but it is possible.
By understanding the signs of narcissistic personality disorder and taking steps towards creating internal closure, seeking support, cutting off contact, and prioritizing self-care, you can move forward with renewed strength and resilience. Remember, you deserve to be in a healthy, supportive, and loving relationship, free from the control and manipulation of a narcissist.
In conclusion, getting closure with a narcissist is a complex and difficult process. It is not easy to deal with someone who lacks empathy and is focused purely on their own self-interest.
However, it is possible to get closure, whether through accepting a lack of closure, seeking out support and guidance, cutting off contact, or creating internal closure. The key is to prioritize your own mental and emotional well-being, learn about narcissistic personality disorder, and take responsibility for your own part in the relationship.
Moving forward with self-love and a positive outlook is essential in ensuring that you avoid future abusive relationships and experience the healthy, supportive, and loving relationship that you deserve.
