The Mating Grounds

Build a Positive Connection with Your Ex: A Guide to Getting Back Together

Hey there,

Breaking up is never easy. It can be incredibly painful to accept that someone you care about deeply no longer wants to be in a romantic relationship with you.

But what happens when they say they want to be friends? Here are some things you need to know and consider when your ex wants to remain friends.

Why Your Ex Wants to Be Friends

First of all, why does your ex want to be friends? There are a few possible reasons.

Perhaps they’re trying to let you down easy and brush off the hurt feelings you may have. Maybe they genuinely value the connection between you two and want to keep you in their life.

And, unfortunately, maybe the emotions and baggage from your relationship are getting in the way, and your ex feels like being friends is the only way to maintain a healthy relationship between you.

What to Do When Your Ex Wants to Be Friends

So, what should you do if your ex wants to be friends with you? Here are some ideas to consider:


Stay friends and give them space to feel things out. If your ex wants to be friends, and you’re okay with that, give them space to navigate their emotions.

They may be uncertain about what they want, and being patient and understanding may help them figure things out. Keep the lines of communication open and don’t push them into anything they’re not ready for.

2. Don’t have a hidden agenda to get back together.

While it’s understandable that you may still have feelings for your ex, it’s essential to remember that they want to be friends not move back into a romantic relationship with you. Trying to manipulate the situation to your favor can cause more frustration and upset for both of you.

3. Focus on the quality of the emotional connection.

If you and your ex do decide to remain friends, strive to keep the emotional connection healthy and positive. Avoid rehashing old arguments or discussing past resentments.

Instead, focus on enjoying each other’s company and creating new, positive memories together.

The Pros and Cons of Staying Friends with Your Ex

Being friends with an ex can be challenging, but it can also have its benefits. Here’s a look at some of the pros and cons of remaining friends with your former partner:


– It can provide closure and help you adjust to life post-breakup.

– If the relationship ended amicably, it can mean keeping cherished friends and memories. – It can help you move on from the romantic relationship and transition into a platonic one.


– It can make it harder to truly move on from each other. – It can lead to confusion and false hope if one or both of you want to rekindle the romance.

– It can be difficult to set boundaries and maintain a healthy emotional connection. Ultimately, whether you decide to remain friends with your ex or not should come down to what’s best for your emotional health and well-being.

In conclusion, if your ex wants to be friends, it’s essential to take some time to consider your feelings and how it could impact your emotional health. Remember to focus on the quality of the emotional connection, avoid having a hidden agenda to resume the relationship, and stay mindful of the pros and cons of staying friends.

Whatever you decide, stay true to yourself and your emotional needs.

Be kind to yourself, and good luck.

Hey there,

When it comes to getting back together with your ex, many people focus on the end goal the outcome of being in a romantic relationship again. However, focusing solely on the end product can make the process more difficult.

Instead, it’s important to prioritize building and maintaining a positive emotional connection with your ex. Here’s why:

Focus on the Means, Not Just the End Goal

Getting back together with an ex is not always easy, and it’s essential to understand that it’s a process, not just a goal.

If you’re solely focused on the outcome of being in a romantic relationship again, you may lose sight of the steps you need to take to get there. Instead, try to focus on the means the things you can do to improve your emotional connection with your ex.

This means being present, showing genuine interest in their life, and communicating well. Focus on positive interactions and keeping a healthy balance between the emotional connection you share and the space you both need.

Building Positive Connections

To increase the likelihood of getting back together with your ex, it’s crucial to build healthy and positive connections first. This can help your ex envision a future where the two of you are in a romantic relationship again.

One of the best ways to start building positive connections with your ex is to create fun and shared experiences. Go on a picnic, take a fun trip, or partake in their favorite activity together.

This not only gives you quality time together, but it also strengthens your shared bond and creates new positive memories. Another crucial element is communication.

Talk with your ex about their day, share your feelings and hopes for the future, and listen actively to their words. Showing kindness, empathy, respect, and understanding goes a long way toward creating positive connections with your ex.

Avoiding the Friend Zone

Being placed in the friend zone can be a significant hurdle in getting back together with your ex. However, focusing on building an emotional connection can help prevent this scenario from occurring.

One of the most important things is to be upfront with your intentions. Clearly state that you’re interested in more than just friendship and focus on creating deeper and more meaningful connections.

Above all, be authentic with your ex. Show them that you’re genuine in your desire to be in a romantic relationship, and create opportunities for shared positive experiences.

If they sense that you’re not being genuine or are only interested in a friendship, they may continue to view you only as a friend.

Final Thoughts

Don’t lose sight of the importance of building a positive emotional connection with your ex. Many people make the mistake of focusing only on the end goal of getting back together instead of prioritizing the means of creating healthy and positive connections.

Remember to be authentic, communicate openly and from the heart, and focus on creating shared experiences and positive outcomes.

By focusing on the means rather than the end goal, building positive connections, and avoiding the friend zone, you dramatically increase your chances of getting back together with an ex.

So, take the time to invest in the emotional connection, and good luck on your journey. In conclusion, building and maintaining a positive emotional connection with your ex is essential, whether you’re trying to remain friends or get back together in a romantic relationship.

Focusing on means over end goals, building positive connections, and avoiding the friend zone all plays a vital role in the process. Take the time to invest in the emotional connection, communicate openly and genuinely, and create shared experiences to strengthen your emotional connection.

By prioritizing the process of emotional connection, you increase your chances of positive outcomes in the present and the future. Good luck on your journey.

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