Is Your Marriage at Risk of Being Taken for Granted? 4 Ways to Prioritize Your Relationship


Don’t Take Your Spouse for Granted: The Importance of Showing Appreciation and Care

Do you remember the early days of your relationship, when every small act of love and attention felt like a precious gem? When you spent hours talking, laughing, and discovering each other’s quirks and dreams?

When you felt truly seen and understood, cherished and desired? Now think about your current relationship.

Are you still showing your partner how much you care and appreciate them? Or have you taken their presence for granted, assuming that they will always be there and that your love is strong enough to withstand any obstacle?

The truth is, no relationship is immune from the corrosive effects of indifference, neglect, and boredom. We all have busy lives, stressors, and distractions that can make us forget the importance and beauty of our connection with our spouse.

However, the more we ignore and minimize the need for recognition and appreciation, the more we risk losing the magic and joy of being with someone who truly loves and supports us. In this article, we will explore the reasons why not taking your spouse for granted is crucial for a healthy and fulfilling relationship, and some practical tips for showing your partner that you still care and value them.

Ignoring the Need for Recognition and Appreciation

One of the most common reasons why couples drift apart and become discontented is the lack of recognition and appreciation for each other’s efforts and qualities. When we stop noticing and commenting on the positive things that our spouse does, whether it’s cooking a delicious meal, doing the laundry, or listening to our problems, we send a message that their contribution and presence are not that important to us.

Furthermore, when we only focus on their flaws and mistakes, we create an atmosphere of tension and criticism, and erode their self-esteem and confidence. No one likes to feel like they are constantly under a microscope, waiting for their next fault to be detected and criticized.

So, if you want to avoid this trap and keep your relationship thriving, it’s crucial to express your gratitude and admiration for your spouse on a regular basis. This can take many forms, such as saying “Thank you” for the things they do for you, praising their strengths and achievements, and acknowledging their efforts and sacrifices.

Saturation and Stagnancy in Relationships

Another threat to the vitality and passion of a relationship is the feeling of saturation and stagnancy. When we become too comfortable and complacent in our routines and habits, when we stop challenging ourselves and our partner, when we stop trying new things and exploring new sides of ourselves, we risk losing the spark and excitement that made us fall in love in the first place.

Moreover, when we take our spouse for granted, we give them less reasons to stay attracted and interested in us. If we stop paying attention to our appearance, our manners, and our communication skills, if we stop flirting, teasing, and seducing them, we lose the sense of mystery and allure that fuels desire and intimacy.

Therefore, if you want to prevent your relationship from becoming stale and predictable, it’s important to keep surprising and delighting your partner with new experiences, surprises, and gestures of love. This can mean taking them on a weekend getaway to a new place, preparing a romantic dinner with candlelit ambiance, writing them a heartfelt love letter, or simply holding their hand and telling them how much they mean to you.

Showing Your Partner That You Still Care

Now that we have explored why taking your spouse for granted is detrimental to your relationship, let’s focus on some practical ways to show your partner that you still care and value them.

1. Make time for quality communication

In our fast-paced and technologically-dependent world, it’s easy to neglect the importance of face-to-face and heart-to-heart conversations with our spouse. However, a healthy and fulfilling relationship requires that we make time and space for quality communication, during which we can share our thoughts, emotions, and concerns, as well as listen to our partner with empathy and respect.

So, whether it’s during breakfast, after work, or before bed, make sure to devote some undivided attention to your partner, without distractions or interruptions. Ask them about their day, how they feel, what they are excited about, and what challenges they are facing.

Show genuine interest and curiosity in their passions, hobbies, and dreams. Also, be open and honest about your own feelings, needs, and desires.

Share your joys and sorrows, your hopes and fears, your plans and goals. Embrace vulnerability and authenticity, and encourage your partner to do the same.

2. Appreciate and acknowledge their efforts

As we mentioned earlier, recognition and appreciation are key ingredients for a happy and healthy relationship.

Therefore, make sure to notice and validate your spouse’s efforts, small and big, in making your life better and more enjoyable. Say “thank you” for the things they do, and explain how their actions make you feel.

Use specific and genuine language, such as “I appreciate how you always make time to listen to me when I’m stressed”, or “I admire your dedication and creativity in your work”. Also, be mindful of the power of nonverbal communication.

Smile, hug, kiss, and touch your partner in ways that convey your affection and gratitude. Make eye contact and nod or smile when they speak, to show that you are attentive and interested.

These small gestures can make a big difference in how your spouse perceives your love and support.

3. Keep the romance and intimacy alive

Finally, don’t forget the importance of keeping the romance and intimacy alive in your relationship. This doesn’t mean that you have to go on extravagant dates or buy expensive gifts every week, but rather that you prioritize your connection with your spouse and nurture it with playful and loving interactions.

This can mean many things, depending on your personalities and preferences. For example, you can flirt and tease each other in a gentle and respectful way, leaving little notes or texts that express your love and admiration, giving each other massages or foot rubs, or sharing a funny meme or video that makes you both laugh.

Also, be mindful of the power of touch and physical affection. Holding hands, cuddling, kissing, and making love are essential ways to express your love and connection with your partner, and to reap the benefits of oxytocin, the bonding hormone.


In conclusion, not taking your spouse for granted is crucial for a fulfilling and healthy relationship. By showing your partner that you care and appreciate them, by keeping the romance and intimacy alive, and by making time for quality communication and experiences, you can deepen and strengthen your bond and create a lifetime of love, friendship, and joy.

Remember, it’s the little things that count, and that make your relationship unique and precious. So, never stop cherishing and valuing your spouse, and watch your love grow and flourish!

The Importance of Prioritizing Your Marriage

Marriage is a beautiful yet complex relationship that requires constant nurturing and prioritization to thrive. A successful and fulfilling marriage is not just about finding the right person or having chemistry and passion; it’s also about being conscious of the dynamics between you and your spouse, being aware of the differences between men and women in communication and emotional needs, and constantly defending, supporting, and nurturing your partnership.

In this article, we will delve into the four main aspects of prioritizing your marriage: relationship awareness, relationship assurances, defending and supporting your spouse, and nurturing your relationship.

Being Conscious of Relationship Dynamics

Relationship dynamics refer to the patterns, roles, and expectations that shape the way you and your spouse interact and perceive each other. These dynamics are complex and multi-dimensional, influenced by cultural, social, and personal factors such as upbringing, values, personality traits, and life experiences.

One common issue that can arise in a marriage is a lack of awareness or acceptance of these dynamics, leading to misunderstandings, conflicts, and hurt feelings. For example, men and women often have different communication styles, with men tending to be more direct, concise, and solution-focused, while women tend to be more indirect, elaborate, and emotion-focused.

If a man expects his wife to communicate like he does, or vice versa, they may miss important cues and messages, leading to frustration and resentment. Therefore, being conscious of the relationship dynamics between you and your spouse, and communicating openly and respectfully about them, is crucial for a healthy and happy marriage.

This can mean acknowledging your strengths and weaknesses, appreciating your partner’s differences, and adapting your style and expectations to fit the situation.

Long-Term Relationships Require Assurances

Another aspect of prioritizing your marriage is providing and receiving relationship assurances. Assurances are the verbal and nonverbal ways in which we express our love, commitment, and emotional stability to our spouse.

They serve as a source of comfort, security, and trust, and help us navigate the ups and downs of a long-term relationship. Assurances can take many forms, such as saying “I love you”, giving hugs, kisses, and affectionate touches, providing reassurance during stressful times, and being supportive and empathetic when your spouse needs you.

By showing your spouse that you care about their well-being, that you stand by them in good times and bad, and that you value their presence and contribution to your life, you create a strong emotional bond that can sustain your relationship through any challenges.

Defending and Supporting Your Spouse

In any marriage, there will be times when you and your spouse face external or internal pressures that threaten to undermine your connection and harmony. These pressures can come from family, friends, work, or personal issues such as health problems, financial stress, or life transitions.

During these times, it’s crucial to defend and support your spouse, emotionally and physically, and to put your partnership above any other interests or priorities. Defending and supporting your spouse means being their ally and champion, standing up for their rights and dignity, and advocating for their needs and wishes.

It also means being selfless and compassionate, putting their needs before your own, and sacrificing your time and energy to help them deal with their challenges. By showing your spouse that you have their back, that you believe in their strengths and resilience, and that you are willing to fight for them, you create a sense of safety and trust that can deepen your love and respect for each other.

Nurturing Your Relationship

The final aspect of prioritizing your marriage is nurturing your relationship, on a daily and long-term basis. Nurturing means maintaining a balance between your individual goals and interests and your shared vision and values, and creating a positive and supportive environment that encourages growth, learning, and joy.

Some ways to nurture your relationship include:

  • Making time for frequent communication and connection, such as sharing meals, walks, hobbies, or interests together
  • Celebrating your accomplishments, milestones, and special occasions with enthusiasm and creativity
  • Prioritizing your physical and emotional intimacy, such as scheduling date nights, practicing rituals of affection, or exploring new ways to express your love and desire
  • Seeking help and guidance when needed, such as attending counseling, workshops, or retreats that can enhance your communication, problem-solving, or intimacy skills

By nurturing your relationship with care and intention, you create a foundation of mutual respect, appreciation, and admiration that can withstand any challenge or storm.

Expressing Gratitude and Appreciation

Finally, a powerful way to prioritize your marriage is to express gratitude and appreciation for your spouse, on a regular basis. Gratitude is the feeling of thankfulness and joy that arises when we acknowledge the positive aspects of our lives, such as our health, our relationships, our accomplishments, and our blessings.

Appreciation is the act of expressing that gratitude through words, gestures, or actions, and letting our loved ones know how much they mean to us. Appreciation can have many benefits, such as boosting our own happiness and well-being, strengthening our emotional bonds, and creating a positive feedback loop of kindness and generosity.

Some ways to express gratitude and appreciation for your spouse include:

  • Saying “thank you” for the things they do, such as cooking, cleaning, or taking care of the kids
  • Acknowledging their strengths and achievements, such as their career success, their creative projects, or their personal growth
  • Complimenting their physical, emotional, and intellectual attributes, such as their beauty, humor, intelligence, or kindness
  • Listening actively and empathetically when they speak, giving them your undivided attention and validating their feelings and thoughts
  • Doing small gestures of kindness and thoughtfulness, such as leaving them notes, bringing them surprise gifts, or performing Acts of Service

By expressing gratitude and appreciation for your spouse, you not only make them feel valued and loved, but also enhance the positivity and joy in your own life. It’s a win-win situation, and one that can transform your marriage into a nurturing and fulfilling journey.


In conclusion, prioritizing your marriage is crucial for a healthy, fulfilling, and long-lasting marital relationship. Being conscious of relationship dynamics, providing and receiving relationship assurances, defending and supporting your spouse, nurturing your relationship, and expressing gratitude and appreciation are all key aspects of prioritizing your marriage.

By dedicating time, energy, and intention to these aspects, you can deepen your emotional bond, grow as individuals and as a couple, and create a shared vision of love, respect, and joy. Remember, a successful marriage is not automatic or guaranteed; it’s a constant process of prioritization and growth, one that requires patience, effort, and care.

But the rewards, in terms of love, companionship, and fulfillment, are priceless and eternal.

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