Commitment-Phobe: Signs and Behaviors You Should Look Out For
Are you seeing someone and have a sneaky feeling they might not be as committed to you as you are to them? If you’re feeling unsure, it’s natural to feel anxious or worried.
However, there are very clear signs and behaviors of a commitment-phobe that you can look out for. Let’s dive in and identify these warning signs so that you can make the best decision for yourself.
Signs of a Commitment-Phobe:
1. Short-Term Relationships
Have you noticed that the person you’re seeing has had many short relationships in the past? Does it seem like they can’t stay in a relationship for more than a few months?
This might be a sign that they have commitment-phobia. It’s challenging to be in a committed relationship if the relationship never goes past the initial fling phase.
2. Refusing to Call Past Relationships ‘Real Ones’
Has the person you’re seeing ever mentioned that their past relationships were not ‘real ones’? This might indicate that they treated those relationships as casual without any emotional investment.
It is possible that they only want casual relationships because they can avoid getting too emotionally attached.
3. Enjoys the Chase but Not the Kill
Does your partner enjoy the excitement of the beginning stages of a relationship but seem to lose interest as soon as things get serious? They could be sabotaging anything that could lead to a commitment.
Commitment-phobes often enjoy the seduction stage and then take a step back once they feel like they’re getting too close.
4. Avoiding Meeting Your Friends/Family
Are they hesitant to meet your friends or family?
Do they always come up with excuses never to attend family gatherings or events with you? This behavior is an alarm because it means they’re not ready for anything serious and might be trying to keep the relationship secret.
5. Frequent Career Changes
Are they always changing jobs or careers? Changing jobs is normal but if your partner seems to be changing it excessively or jumping from one field to another, they could have issues with commitment.
Changing jobs frequently is an indication that they struggle to find long-term satisfaction with anything in their life, which could be a warning sign in your relationship, too.
Behaviors of a Commitment-Phobe:
1. Playing the Seduction-Rejection Game
Do they send mixed signals and play hot and cold? Giving you attention one day and avoiding you the next?
Be wary of this behavior. It is common among commitment-phobes to keep you guessing and always insecure, which affects your emotional health.
2. Needing More Space Than You’re Giving
Do they only want to see you once or twice a week? Do they seem to prioritize their own personal time and hobbies over spending time with you?
These might be signs that they need more space away from commitment and relationships.
3. Choosing Partners Who Are Different From Their Type
If they’re usually attracted to a particular type of person, but you don’t fit that mold, they might be dating you to avoid commitment. By dating someone they don’t see a future with, they know that they can end the relationship without much emotional attachment.
4. Traveling A Lot for Work
Are they always on the go for work? Do they travel frequently or take on jobs that require travel?
This is a way to avoid having to commit to a relationship. Being out of the town means they can avoid being physically present and emotionally attached, and play on the distance between themselves and their partner.
5. Treating You as a Low Priority
If your partner always treats you unfairly and doesn’t prioritize you, it could be because they don’t see the relationship as serious. They might be inconsistent with their word, forgetful or flaky with plans, which can leave you feeling neglected or resentful.
In conclusion, being aware of these signs and behaviors can help you figure out if your partner is a commitment-phobe. Remember, nobody can change their partner, and it’s essential to be aware of the red flags and act on them instead of pretending everything is alright.
If your partner is commitment-phobic, it’s time to start talking about what that means for your relationship. Communication is the key, and it’s the best way to determine where your relationship is headed.
In conclusion, a commitment-phobic partner can cause emotional distress and anxiety, and it’s vital to recognize the signs and behaviors early on to make the best decision for yourself. Understanding them and openly communicating about them can help avoid being stuck in an unfulfilling relationship that ultimately leads to heartbreak.
It’s essential not to settle for less than you deserve and to take care of yourself always. By acknowledging the signs and addressing them openly instead of ignoring them, you can take control of the situation and move forward towards a healthy and happy relationship.
