Surviving a Narcissistic Breakup: Control Tricks and Moving On


Dealing with a Narcissist’s Breakup: A Survival Guide

Breakups are always tough, but they can be especially difficult when you’re dealing with a narcissist. Narcissists have a unique ability to get inside your head, manipulate your emotions, and leave you feeling confused, helpless, and drained.

If you’re currently going through a breakup with a narcissist, don’t despair. This article will give you practical tips and strategies for coping with the situation and moving on with your life.

Controlling the Uncontrollable

One of the hallmarks of narcissism is the intense need for control. Narcissists crave dominance in all areas of their lives, including their romantic relationships.

Therefore, it should come as no surprise that they’ll want to control your breakup too. Here are a few things to keep in mind:

  • The narcissist will want to end things on their terms, even if it’s not what you want.
  • They may make sudden, abrupt decisions without warning, leaving you confused and off-balance.
  • They will be irritable and easily provoked, so be on your guard for arguments or conflicts.

Spotting the Signs of a Narcissistic Breakup

While every breakup has its unique flavor, narcissists often follow a predictable pattern when ending relationships. Here are some signs that a breakup is coming:

  • Narcissists may suddenly become distant or cold.
  • They may start picking fights to create a toxic atmosphere.
  • They’ll become sneakier and more manipulative than ever before.

Be Aware of Narcissistic Plans

Narcissists are cunning and crafty, which means they may have a few tricks up their sleeves as you confront the idea of a breakup. Here’s what to watch out for:

  • The narcissist may try to use your insecurities to manipulate you.
  • They might start making promises they don’t intend to keep, such as “I’ll change for you, I swear.”
  • Be aware that they may create a toxic environment to get you to love them even more.

Dealing with Sex as a Weapon

One of the most insidious ways a narcissist can try to control you is with sex. Here’s how to handle it:

  • Narcissists will often deny sex to punish you or as a way to keep you under their control.
  • They may beg for sex as a way to boost their ego.
  • Just because your narcissistic ex-partner wants sex doesn’t mean it’s the right thing for you.

Moving On From Your Narcissist

Breaking up with a narcissist can be tough, but it’s essential to keep your head up and move on. Here are a few things to keep in mind:

  • It’s okay to feel angry, depressed, or overwhelmed.
  • Try to remind yourself that it’s better to be out of a toxic environment.
  • Recovering from a breakup with a narcissist can be a long, multi-step process.
  • Don’t hesitate to reach out for support and help when you need it.
  • Remember, the best revenge is living a happy life without them!

Dealing with the Aftermath of the Breakup

The period following the breakup can be a trying time, but there are ways that you can cope and begin to heal:

  • Be kind to yourself. Treat yourself to activities you enjoy and make sure to focus on self-care exercises.
  • Don’t hesitate to seek out therapy or counseling. Being able to talk to someone who understands your experience can be hugely positive for mental health.
  • Finally, remember that as time passes, the hurt will begin to diminish, and life will become brighter again.


No one should have to endure the pain and heartache that often comes with a breakup, much less with a narcissist. However, by understanding the narcissistic personality and the tactics that narcissists use, you can protect yourself and find ways to move on.

Whether it’s leaning on supportive friends, seeking advice from professionals, or even just taking time to remember all the blessings in your life – remember that you are never alone. Narcissistic behavior patterns have long been studied, and while the personality disorder presents itself differently in each individual, there are common behavior patterns that people should be aware of.

Understanding the Narcissist

In this section, we will explore the need for attention, manipulative behavior, escalating emotions, and lack of empathy commonly portrayed by narcissists. In the beginning of any relationship, it can be easy to mistake narcissistic behavior for charming or confident qualities.

However, as the relationship progresses, the reality of their behavior patterns becomes increasingly apparent. Narcissists can be irresistible in their need for attention, adoration, and love.

They thrive on admiration and will go to great lengths to get it. The need for attention can manifest in various ways such as boasting, grandiose behavior, or attention-seeking tendencies like dressing provocatively.

Manipulative behavior is another hallmark of narcissistic personality disorder. A narcissist will set up situations in which they can control the outcome.

They can be deceitful in their communications, twist the truth to fit their narrative, and push people to do things they wouldn’t normally do. Gaslighting is also a common tactic used by narcissists in which they will make their partners question their sanity by manipulating reality.

They will set up the situation, make their partner upset, and then blame them for the entire situation. Escalating emotions are also common and unpredictable in narcissists.

One moment they may be loving and affectionate, while the next, they become distant and irritable. Their emotions can be all over the place, erratic, and drastic.

They can grow cold and distant, causing confusion and anxiety. A lack of empathy is perhaps the most prominent characteristic of the narcissistic personality disorder.

They are heartless, uncaring, and have no concept of how their behavior affects others. They can be incredibly self-centered and have little to no regard for other people’s feelings, especially if it conflicts with their own needs and desires.

Recognizing the Signs of a Narcissistic Relationship

When it comes to narcissistic relationships, it’s essential to recognize the signs of a narcissistic partner. While the toxic behavior can come in many forms, abusive, controlling, and manipulative behavior are common.

In most cases, the partner of a narcissist may feel like they are walking on eggshells. The narcissist may become easily angered, jealous, and controlling.

Their partners may feel like they are in a constant state of danger. The cycle of a narcissistic relationship can be especially damaging.

It starts with idealization, in which the narcissist puts their partner on a pedestal and makes them feel like they have found their soulmate. This phase is short-lived and almost always followed by devaluation, when the narcissist begins to criticize and demean their partner.

This phase can be incredibly draining and can take a toll on the partner’s emotional and mental well-being. Finally, the relationship ends in discard, where the narcissist abruptly ends the relationship and moves on without remorse.

The Impact of Narcissistic Abuse

The impact on victims of narcissistic relationships can be damaging and traumatic. It can take considerable time and effort for the individual to recover from the experience.

The partner may begin to question their own self-worth and self-esteem, which can lead to anxiety and depression. In some of the worst cases, the victim may develop post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).

It’s essential for individuals who have been in a narcissistic relationship to seek support and professional help to aid in recovery. In conclusion, knowing the common behavior patterns that narcissists display in relationships can help individuals recognize and take the necessary steps to prevent themselves from becoming victims.

Paying attention to signs of manipulative behavior, overwhelming attention-seeking tendencies, a lack of empathy, and escalated emotions is essential. And, most importantly, remember that if you have been in an abusive or traumatic relationship with a narcissist, know that recovery is possible – and you do not have to suffer alone.

Seek help from friends, family, and professionals to aid in your journey towards healing. In conclusion, understanding the behavior patterns and tendencies of a narcissistic personality can be crucial to recognizing and preventing the abuse and trauma that can occur in relationships with these individuals.

Behaviors such as the need for attention, manipulative tactics, and a lack of empathy can all be warning signs, as can the cycle of idealization, devaluation, and discard that often characterizes narcissistic relationships. While the impact on victims of narcissistic abuse can be challenging and long-lasting, it’s important to remember that recovery is possible, and seeking help and support can be the first step toward healing.

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