Surviving Heartbreak: 11 Strategies for Coping with Your First Breakup

Break up And Loss

Dealing with Heartbreak: Coping Strategies for Surviving Your First Breakup

First things first: we’re sorry you’re going through this. There’s no denying that experiencing your first breakup can be a rite of passage, but that doesn’t make it any less overwhelming, confusing, and crippling.

The pain and agony of heartbreak can be so intense that it feels like the world might end. However, hang in there – you will recover.

It’s crucial to remember that your first love is just that, your first. And often that means you have given a lot of emotional investment in this person, which makes the process of healing seem impossible.

In this post, we’re going to discuss the coping strategies you can use to get through your first breakup.

Tip #1: Acceptance of the Difficulty of First Breakup

When you’re in your first relationship, it’s easy to be naive and idealistic.

You may have had certain expectations about how things would be, how the romance will live on forever, and maybe even get married – but nobody told you how hard it would be when things don’t go according to plan. So when a break-up occurs, it can be unceremonious and hard to get over.

However, it’s okay to recognize that first breakups are tough, and allow yourself to take comfort in that this is a universal pain that everyone goes through at some point.

Tip #2: Allowing Yourself to Wallow

Heartbreak is a gut-wrenching pain that heavily relies on your body’s ability to cry it all out and feel the pain; embrace the tears and the sadness that come along with it.

Don’t try to suppress your emotions or pretend that you’re not feeling low. After all, it’s an intricate part of the process of healing.

Therefore, wallow in the pain and process to deal with it.

Tip #3: Following the No-Contact Rule

In this era of technology, it’s tempting to try to talk to your ex, wish them a happy birthday, or check their status online.

However, following the No Contact rule is what’s best for everyone. You haven’t reached a level of closure, and there is no need to keep reopening the wound.

Take control of your emotions and decide to let go.

Tip #4: Leaning on Friends and Family

Surrounding yourself with people who care for you and offer comfort, empathy, and advice can be incredibly helpful.

Share your heartbreak story with people close to you, and you will realize you’re not alone. Hearing about their experiences dealing with heartbreak can put things into perspective and provide the comfort you need.

Tip #5: Reflecting on the Relationship

As much as you loved your ex and cherished the good moments, it’s time to reflect on the dynamic of your relationship. Did you constantly fight?

Were there differences you failed to fix? Sometimes, relationships become toxic, and it’s time to realize this and move on.

Reflect on the real dynamics of your ex-relationship, and use the experience to learn and grow.

Tip #6: Figuring Out Who You Are as an Individual

Take this time to reconnect with yourself and figure out who you are as an individual.

Now that the relationship is over, it’s time to prioritize your emotional and physical well-being. Discover new hobbies, explore new places, and pursue your passions.

Use this time to create an independent life and build your self-confidence back up.

Tip #7: Creating Happy Distractions

Endorphins are an excellent natural remedy to help you cope with intense emotions.

Engage in activities that bring you joy and get up and about. Consider trying out new self-care routines, read a book, join a workout class, or engage in a kind of sport.

The mundane things you do during the day also count.

Tip #8: Getting a Change of Scene

A short weekend getaway or attending a family reunion is a great way to gain perspective and turn over a new leaf.

Being in a different environment gives you a refreshing outlook on things, and sometimes all you need is a little shift in perspective.

Tip #9: Giving Your Living Space a Makeover

Having numerous memories of your ex can be challenging to deal with.

Making little changes in your space, such as rearranging your furniture, a fresh coat of paint, or buying new bedding, can give you a fresh start. It can also help “mask away” all the memories and make the healing process a lot easier.

Tip #10: Having No Wishy-Washy

On-again-off-again relationships, also known as “toxic cycles,” make it difficult to heal, leading to constant friction, arguments, and ultimately, resentment. If you see yourself getting back to that toxic cycle, it’s best to move forward without looking back.

No wishy-washy and no what-ifs.

Tip #11: Holding Off on Rebounds

Jumping into dating too soon after a breakup may seem like a good idea, but this can mess up your healing process.

Take time to do some inner work before getting back into the dating scene. Honor your grieving process and take time to figure out what you want from future relationships.


Going through heartbreak is an experience everyone goes through at some point. The pain can seem overwhelming and unbearable, but there are coping strategies you can use to get through your first breakup.

Reflect on who you are as an individual, lean on friends and family for support, and take steps to create happy distractions. No matter how hard this heartbreak feels, time does heal.

If you are going through a tough break-up, remember, it’s okay not to feel okay. Hang in there – this too shall pass.

You’re not alone, and the pain won’t last forever. Keep these coping strategies in mind, take it one day at a time, and remember to be kind to yourself during this difficult time.

FAQs on First Breakup: Everything You Need to Know

Going through your first breakup can feel like the end of the world. The pain it causes can be unparalleled, and knowing how to heal and recover can seem overwhelming.

In this post, we’ve compiled some of the most frequently asked questions about first breakups to help you navigate this challenging time.

FAQ #1: Is Your First Breakup the Hardest?

Yes, your first breakup can be the hardest, primarily because it’s your first experience with heartbreak. Many people believe that the pain of a first breakup is unparalleled compared to subsequent breakups because of the naivety and idealism involved in first love.

You may have had certain expectations or hopes of a fairytale romance that did not work out, leading to severe emotional distress.

FAQ #2: What Should You Do After Your First Breakup?

The breakup process is difficult, and the best thing to do is to allow yourself to grieve and process the pain healthily. Grief is a necessary and natural part of the healing process, so let yourself feel the emotions and identify what went wrong in the relationship.

Additionally, take some time to rediscover yourself and find your independent identity. Spend time doing things you enjoy, developing new hobbies, and nurturing long-term friendships.

Ultimately, remember that recovery will occur over time, so don’t rush it, and let yourself heal at your own pace.

FAQ #3: How Long Does It Take to Get Over Your First Breakup?

There is no one definitive answer to this question, and the duration of healing and recovery depends on several factors. Research suggests that it takes, on average, around 11 weeks or three months to move on from a breakup.

However, this duration can vary significantly depending on your attachment style, personality, and the circumstances surrounding the relationship’s demise. Ultimately, the healing process differs from person to person, so be patient and kind to yourself as you navigate these unfamiliar terrains.

FAQ #4: What Is the First Love Breakup Advice?

The first love breakup advice is to feel the full extent of the pain and process it in a healthy manner.

It’s common to want to suppress or avoid heartbreak by distracting oneself or numbing the pain, but these are not conducive to healthy healing. Instead, it’s essential to confront the emotions head-on, accept that they’re there, and let it all out so that you can move towards recovery.


Going through a first breakup can be an overwhelming and complicated experience, but it’s also an opportunity for growth, learning, and self-discovery. By processing the pain and emotions healthily, rediscovering your independent identity, and allowing yourself time to heal, you can emerge stronger and more resilient.

Remember, you’re not alone, and these frequently asked questions have helped many people before you, so let them guide you on your healing journey. In conclusion, dealing with heartbreak, especially your first breakup, is a challenging experience that can leave you feeling overwhelmed, confused, and lost.

However, by following the coping strategies outlined in this article, you can begin to heal and move forward. Accepting that first breakups are hard, giving yourself permission to wallow, reflecting on the relationship, leaning on friends and family, and rediscovering your independent identity are just a few ways to help you through this challenging time.

Remember that healing takes time, so be patient and kind to yourself. Ultimately, this experience can teach you a lot about yourself, love, and life, and set you on a path towards greater emotional and psychological growth.

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