The Nature of Enduring Love
Love is often portrayed in movies as a passionate whirlwind of emotions that sweeps us off our feet. We have been made to believe that when we are “in love,” we experience unending euphoria, and the sense of being one with our partner.
However, the reality tells us that love is not merely a feeling but is a discipline that we cultivate over time. It involves skill and discipline, like learning to play an instrument or mastering a sport.
It requires work, dedication, and patience. The skills include the ability to listen, empathize, communicate, compromise, and forgive.
It is essential to acknowledge the false premise that “in love” couples have perfect relationships. The idea of power-sharing and constant euphoria is a delusion and can often lead to unrealistic expectations.
Divorce statistics show that passionate love does not always last and may lead to disappointment if we anticipate it to be the only form of love. The truth is, enduring love relationships are not minority cases.
Long-term love involves a mature, realistic, and sustainable kind of affection between two people who love each other, notwithstanding their flaws.
Cultivating Enduring Love
Love is like a garden, and it needs continual cultivation, much like a plant that requires attention from the time it is sown to the time it blooms and grows into its fullest potential. Cultivating love requires personal investment, quality time together, and emotional upkeep.
The garden metaphor can be likened to love as we need to fertilize, irrigate, and feed it with positive emotions and experiences that bring joy to the relationship. Likewise, we need to attend to our emotional needs while nurturing the needs of our partners.
In cultivating love, we must remain curious about ourselves and our partners, the world around us, and all the things that can make us grow more curious and eager to learn. Each experience we have with our partners should act as a fertilizer that promotes growth and development for both individuals.
Like passive inhibition, we must also tend to our gardens and protect our relationships from the safety-seeking unconscious mind. Passive inhibition is when we allow fear, anxiety, or fear of abandonment to control our actions and thoughts.
It can result in depersonalization and refusal to meet our emotional and physical needs that lead to the weakening of the relationship. We must learn to set strong boundaries, make decisions towards what we feel is right for our emotional well-being, and keep communication lines open with our partners when we feel emotionally vulnerable.
Conclusion
Enduring love is not a rare phenomenon but is a skill that can be learned over time. It requires personal investment, attention to detail, and emotional upkeep.
The garden metaphor aptly illustrates that love relationships need nurturing to flourish, much like a plant that requires attention to bloom into its fullest potential. We must remain mindful of our emotional needs and build strong boundaries, ensuring that our actions and thoughts are not governed by the safety-seeking unconscious mind.
With continued curiosity, dedication, and the cultivation of love, we can create strong, healthy, and lasting relationships with our loved ones, filled with joy, respect, and mutual understanding.
Creative Love
We often hear people say that they have fallen in love with someone, and the magic just happened. They believe that love is something that either happens or doesn’t.
We tend to believe that falling in love is out of our control, and we are helpless when it comes to matters of the heart. But what if falling in love were a deliberate act that we create with self-discipline and hard work?
What if we could consciously choose to foster loving relationships and create a love that is sustainable, bountiful, and enduring? Choosing to create love is a mindset that requires self-discipline and deliberate actions towards fostering love.
It is a choice that requires two individuals to work together as partners to build a lasting relationship. The process is not always easy, and there will be challenges to overcome.
But the rewards of such diligence are a bountiful crop of love that yields a fulfilling and satisfying relationship. By choosing to create love deliberately, we can nurture our relationship, ensuring that it thrives.
This process involves due diligence – taking the time to learn about our partners’ interests, strengths, and weaknesses. It requires self-awareness and self-reflection.
My Personal Experience
It is worth noting my personal experience with creating enduring love. I have been fortunate to meet my soul mate and my partner for life.
Though we have been together for many years, every day feels fresh, and our love remains as vibrant as ever. Our love story was a deliberate process, as we both had to track down the qualities that we needed in our partner.
We began as friends, and in time, our friendship blossomed into love. It took lots of effort, patience, and communication, but the result was worth it.
Our love often makes me pause and reflect on the idea of the afterlife. The love that we have nurtured over the years is a blessing that I hope will transcend into the afterlife.
Conclusion
In conclusion, creating love is a choice, and we can all choose to cultivate it. When we choose to create love, we choose to commit to fostering a relationship that thrives long-term.
And with due diligence and self-discipline, we can experience the bountiful crop of love that brings satisfaction, fulfillment, and joy into our lives. To sum up, enduring love is not a result of mere chance or the magic of falling in love.
It is a deliberate choice that requires self-discipline and hard work to build and maintain over time. Fostering loving relationships involves curiosity, empathy, communication, and forgiveness to create an enduring and fulfilling bond with our partners.
By choosing to cultivate love through diligence and self-discipline, we can experience the joy, satisfaction, and fulfillment that come with creating a bountiful crop of love that brings happiness to our lives. The consequences of choosing to create love are significant as it nourishes not only our individual well-being but also our relationships that can be sustained long-term.
