The Mating Grounds

The Painful Truth About Infidelity: Can Extramarital Affairs Be Considered True Love?

Infidelity is a painful issue that affects couples in all walks of life. It is tough to say why people cheat on their partners, but studies show that most of them do so as a coping mechanism or because of unmet needs.

Regardless of the reasons behind it, infidelity can take a considerable toll on a relationship. In this article, we’ll explore how affairs break up marriages, whether they last, and their possible impacts on a couple’s life.

Reasons Why People Cheat

Infidelity is one of the most painful experiences an individual can face. Cheating is not just a physical affair as it can also refer to emotional affairs where one partner becomes too close with someone outside of their marriage.

There are several reasons why people cheat on their partners. The most common reason is that they use it as a coping mechanism.

Life can be tough, and when faced with challenges, some people seek solace beyond their relationships. Another reason people cheat is due to unmet needs.

If one’s partner is not meeting their emotional or physical needs, they may begin to look elsewhere. For instance, a partner who is not getting enough emotional support may find it from someone outside of their marriage.

Similarly, if the sexual chemistry between two partners diminishes, one might be tempted to find it somewhere else.

Types of Affairs that Break a Marriage

There are different types of affairs that can break a marriage. However, the ones that are more serious and committed tend to have a lasting impact on relationships.

Long-term exclusivity breaches the foundation of marriage and what it stands for. Breaking that exclusivity causes severe emotional turmoil in relationships.

It is important to note that it takes time and effort to build a happy, strong and lasting marriage. Allowing affairs to compromise marital fidelity causes lasting cracks in the marriage.

These cracks put an enormous amount of emotional weight on the partners, making it difficult to repair the relationship.

Other Impacts of Infidelity

Infidelity not only erodes the trust two partners have in each other, but it also robs the marriage of joy and intimacy as partners become closed off from each other. Losing that trust can make it hard for partners to communicate and collaborate, which further leads to stagnation in the relationship.

Moreover, infidelity can be damaging to the respect partners have for each other, which is the underpinning of any healthy relationship. These issues cause havoc in both partners in the short term and long term damaging the relationship even more.

Now that you know the reasons why affairs break marriages and the possible impacts of infidelity, let’s address the question of whether such affairs last. Do Affairs That Break Up a Marriage Last?

The answer is that it depends on several factors. For instance, healing from the pain caused by an affair takes time and effort, especially if the betrayal was severe.

The foundation of the affair also plays a significant role. Was it based on love or just a physical pleasure seeking adventure?

If the affair was based on substance, the emotions that brought the two people together could last a long time. However, the guilt factor in a relationship tends to chip away at the foundation of the affair, causing its eventual collapse.

Family and children acceptance is often detrimental to the longevity of a relationship spawned from an affair. Children usually view one parent’s infidelity as a betrayal that scars them mentally.

Acceptance from family members also matters in the long term development of relationships spawned from an affair. They may see such a relationship as “stolen happiness” and disapprove, pressuring partners to break up.

Additionally, the thrill factor that comes with the adultery fades over time, and there comes a time when the partners realize that they are not fulfilling each other’s needs in the same way their partner did. And finally, the state of the marriage the cheating partner was in while they began their affair determines how long affairs from that situation last.

Was their partner emotionally checked out, or did they plan on leaving the marriage? All these factors murk the waters of how long an affair will last.

Given the several factors that determine how long relationships spawned from an affair last, the rates of second marriages from affairs tend to be low. Partners come to realize that the long term fall out of their actions far outweigh the excitement created by their short term dalliances.

As a practical matter, couples fractured by affairs usually part ways since confession and forgiveness are not an easy process to undertake.


The issue of infidelity is painful and can take a considerable toll on a relationship. There are many reasons why people cheat, from using it as a coping mechanism to unmet needs.

Different kinds of affairs break up marriages, and there is no telling which one will last. However, infidelity does generally come with erosion of trust and can also cause lasting cracks in the foundation of any marriage.

Given these factors, it becomes difficult to sustain such relationships long term. The collapse of the relationship is perhaps the most damaging effect of infidelity.

It pays to always keep the foundations of our relationships in good shape, as this will go a long way in preventing infidelity from happening in the first place. Extramarital affairs and true love are not words that usually go together in the same sentence.

Most of the time, the idea of true love fundamentally implies that two people are committed to each other emotionally and physically. Infidelity is often viewed as a betrayal to the expectations of commitment and loyalty.

The concept of extramarital affairs and true love is controversial and complicated, but it happens. In this article, we explore whether extramarital affairs can be considered true love and factors that might contribute to forming such relationships.

The Possibility of Extramarital Affairs as True Love

Many people believe that a person can only share a deep emotional connection with one person in their lives, and they call that person a soulmate. One reason why people engage in extramarital affairs is that they believe they have found their soulmate in someone other than their spouses.

True love, according to this viewpoint, is not limited to the one we married. It is how one conducts themselves when they have these feelings that make the difference.

This train of thought challenges the very definition of true love, as it essentially upholds the idea that there can be more than one true love in a persons life. Love is an emotion beyond reason, and sometimes people choose to follow their heart even if it may lead them down a path that society frowns upon.

Some believe that if they have found their soulmate outside of their marriage, they are justified in pursuing a relationship with them.

The Decision to Engage in Extramarital Affairs

The decision to engage in extramarital affairs rooted in a choice. In the end, only the person knows what their heart wants and what they are willing to sacrifice.

Sometimes, people genuinely love their spouse but have feelings towards another person. It is natural for people to be attracted to others and feel connected to them.

However, choosing to act upon these feelings is where the dilemma lies. How transparent are the communication lines between the partners, and are they supportive of discussing these feelings?

The desire for intimacy and feeling understood is what constitutes the foundation of true love, so if these elements dont exist in ones marriage, it can put a significant strain. Confiding in someone else leads to support and understanding that is missing from the marriage.

So, in essence, extramarital affairs entail choosing to prioritize oneself and their happiness with a person outside of the relationship. While these actions often perceived as selfish some would argue that in the end, everyone is the captain of their own ship.

When Exclusivity Meets Societal Expectations

In a perfect world, people get married, stay committed, stay in love, and continue to make each other happy. However, the world is not perfect, and many situations require drilling down to the reasons that led to the infidelity happening in the first place.

It is not enough to view extramarital affairs as a simple breach of exclusivity; there are nuances that perpetuate these behavours. Societal expectations of commitment, stability, and exclusivity all contribute to the pressure that people put on themselves regarding their marriages.

This pressure may push individuals to seek out connections in other places outside of their marriage. These expectations of social conformity sometimes impose values that do not necessarily agree with everyone, and it is this disconnect that leads to these situations.

Lack of Fulfillment in Marriages

People tend to engage in extramarital affairs because they feel that they are not fulfilling each other’s emotional and physical needs in their marriage. Most affairs that end up being long-standing or serious tend to be cases where individuals feel that they have found something that is fundamentally missing in their marriage.

Intimacy and connection are integral to a successful marriage, and if these elements are missing, people may seek out connection elsewhere. This desire for connection is not necessarily evidence of a lack of true love, but rather a manifestation of relational desire for intimacy and understanding.


From a societal perspective, extramarital affairs are considered synonymous with infidelity and betrayal. While it may be true that exclusivity in marriages is sacrosanct, the dynamics of human emotions and perception creates an area of grey that society glosses over.

These emotions lead people to explore relationships that may run counter to culturally contingent maritalscapes. So, as we wade through the gray areas of emotion, can we say that extramarital affairs are true love, or are they an expression of human want and desire that are not fully understood by societal norms?

The answer to these questions lies in personal values and morals. As change catalysts happen, it is vital that society creates a safe space for couples to be honest with each other about their feelings towards each other and their marriages.

It is only through open communication that we can hope for a world where true love and commitments are valued above the idea of fulfilling social expectations. In conclusion, understanding the impact of infidelity on relationships and the complexities of extramarital affairs is vital in recognizing the nuances of human emotions and making informed choices about our relationships.

Infidelity causes profound emotional pain, fueled by unpredictable and irrational emotions. While true love remains the desire of many, it is vulnerable and susceptible to societal, as well as individual pressures and stereotypes that may be standing in the way of finding real connections.

Our society should create an environment where individuals can express themselves freely in relationships as they are fundamental to human connection and are how we understand and experience the complex emotional milieu that our lives are founded upon. It is through careful reflection and transparent communication that we can navigate the challenges that inevitably arise and find the true happiness we seek in our relationships.

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