The Impact of an Extra Marital Affair on a Marriage
Have you ever heard of the phrase “once a cheater, always a cheater?” Infidelity can be one of the most painful experiences in a relationship and can have an impact on the marriage that lasts long after the affair has ended.
In this article, we will explore the types of affairs, its effects on the marriage, and statistics on survival rates after an affair.
Types of Affairs
There are different types of affairs, including emotional infidelity, physical affairs, and flings.
1. Emotional Infidelity
Emotional infidelity involves a deep connection with someone other than your spouse. It could be sharing intimate details about your life with someone who’s not your partner, or a good friend that has become more than that.
2. Physical Affairs
Physical affairs, on the other hand, involve sexual intimacy with someone else outside the marriage. It could be a one-time thing or a long-standing arrangement.
3. Flings
Finally, flings entail a brief sexual episode with a stranger or someone you barely know.
Effects on the Marriage
Cheating can have a devastating impact on a marriage, and it’s not just about the act itself. The effects of an affair can last long after the affair has ended.
1. Loss of Trust
One of the biggest effects of an affair is a loss of trust. When your spouse cheats on you, the foundation of the relationship is shattered. The victim can find it challenging to believe anything their partner says or does, leading to both partners experiencing emotional distress. Rebuilding trust is no walk in the park. It requires a lot of work and vulnerability from both partners. Some marriages do not survive cheating, but others do. It depends on the culture, social setups, and the willingness of the couple to make things work. If both partners are committed to rebuilding the relationship, then there’s a chance for the marriage to survive.
Statistics on Survival Rates After an Affair
Cheating does not always lead to divorce. However, rebuilding trust is a complicated process that requires effort and patience from both spouses.
According to relationship experts, the survival rate for marriages after an affair is around 31%. But what determines whether a marriage survives or not after cheating?
Factors like willingness, level of commitment, culture, and the social setup of a couple affect the chances of their marriage surviving. Those who consult a marriage counselor have a higher chance of survival.
Seeking guidance from a marriage counselor helps couples process negative feelings, identify and address underlying issues in their marriage, and recreate a new relationship devoid of resentment.
Coping with Infidelity and Surviving an Affair
Being betrayed hurts, but your reaction to the affair could make a significant difference in the long-term success of the marriage. Here are some tips for anyone coping with infidelity in their marriage:
- Both partners must be willing to work on the relationship. Rebuilding trust is challenging and requires mutual commitment.
- Seek help from a relationship expert. A marriage counselor can help you process your negative feelings and provide guidance to rebuild your marriage.
- Identify and address underlying issues in the marriage. Many times, cheating is a symptom of deeper issues in a relationship. Look at what your partner may feel is lacking in the marriage and look at future goals together.
- Avoid involving too many people in the issue. Work closely as a team and avoid seeking outside interference.
- Stop the blame-shifting and focus on rebuilding trust. It’s easy to play the blame game, but it won’t help you heal as a couple. Communication, honesty, and rebuilding trust should be the focus.
- Recreate a new relationship. Focus on positive experiences, let go of resentment, and consider individual counseling/dealing with negative emotions.
- Heal oneself before working on the relationship. Processing your emotions, dealing with guilt, and addressing trust issues is essential before fully exploring the road to recovery.
- Look forward and not backward. Dwelling on the past and raking up old insecurities will not help you move forward. Focus on creating a more positive and empowering future together.
In conclusion, infidelity can be a painful experience, but there’s hope for your marriage to survive if both partners are willing to work towards rebuilding trust and recreating a new relationship. Seek guidance from a relationship expert, identify and address underlying issues, and focus on the future.
Cultural Differences in Surviving an Affair
When it comes to cheating within a marriage, cultural differences can have a significant impact on the outcome of the marriage. Some cultures are more accepting of divorce or have different views on infidelity than others.
In this section, we will explore the cultural differences in divorce rates and survival rates after an affair, focus on cultural differences in India, and the impact of workplace affairs on marriages.
Cultural Differences in Divorce Rates and Survival Rates After an Affair
In Western cultures, divorce is more commonly accepted than in many Eastern cultures. In the United States, divorce rates are much higher than in India, where divorce rates are low and viewed as a taboo.
Other cultures like Turkey and Japan also have low divorce rates. However, it is essential to note that survival rates after an affair vary from culture to culture.
In some cultures, the value of saving the marriage is prioritized over personal happiness. For example, in India, there is a deep sense of family involvement in marital affairs.
Divorce can be seen as a failure of the entire family, and therefore, couples are more likely to work hard to save their marriage, even after infidelity.
In other cultures, like the United States, personal happiness is more important than saving the marriage.
Couples are more likely to divorce immediately after discovering an affair, rather than choosing to try and work it out.
Examples of Cultural Differences in India
India is a culture where marriage is not taken lightly. Divorce rates in India are low, with only 1 in 1,000 married couples divorcing each year.
There are several factors that contribute to this, including the stigma associated with divorce, family involvement in marriages, and inadequate financial independence for women. Family involvement in marriages means that in case of any marital problems, both partners will often seek advice from their extended families instead of seeking help from a marriage counselor.
Extended family members, including grandparents, aunts, uncles, and even neighbors, will provide advice on how to work through the issues. In India, the stigma associated with being divorced makes it a socially undesirable outcome of marriage.
Divorce can cause shame not only to the couple involved but also to their families. This societal pressure encourages couples to work hard to save their marriage, even after an affair.
Additionally, many women in India do not have a lot of financial independence, making it difficult for them to leave an unhappy or unfaithful marriage. They may rely on their husbands financially and have limited options to provide for themselves and their children.
Impact of Workplace Affairs on Marriages
In today’s society, workplace affairs are becoming increasingly common. A study by the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy found that 15% of married women and 25% of married men report having had extramarital affairs.
The prevalence of workplace affairs and the ease of access to extramarital partners can have a detrimental impact on marriages. Workplace affairs can cause emotional distress to the parties involved, as well as those around them.
When two coworkers are having an affair, it can create a hostile work environment for others. Additionally, a partner who spends all their time working and focuses on their career may create a sense of emptiness for their spouse, leading them to seek companionship elsewhere.
In some cases, workplace affairs can also create legal problems. In the worst-case scenario, lawsuits may arise from allegations of sexual harassment or discrimination.
This can cause significant financial and emotional distress for both the individuals involved and their families.
Conclusion
Regardless of cultural differences, infidelity can be a painful experience that can potentially lead to the end of a marriage. However, different cultures have different values around divorce and saving a marriage.
In Western cultures, personal happiness may be valued over saving the marriage, while in Eastern cultures like India, saving the marriage is often prioritized over personal happiness. One thing that remains constant is that marriage is a team effort, and both partners must be committed to making it work.
Seeking advice from a marriage counselor, seeking support from family, addressing underlying issues, and working on trust are key ways to help save a marriage after an affair. In conclusion, infidelity can have a significant impact on a marriage, including the loss of trust and difficulty in rebuilding the relationship.
However, with the willingness of both partners to work on the relationship, seeking guidance from a marriage counselor, addressing underlying issues, and creating a new relationship devoid of resentment, a marriage can overcome an affair. Cultural differences can also have a significant impact on the outcome of the marriage after infidelity, with some cultures valuing saving the marriage over personal happiness.
Regardless of cultural differences, marriage is a team effort, and both partners must be committed to making it work. By focusing on rebuilding trust together and creating a more positive and empowering future, couples can overcome infidelity and strengthen their relationship.