How to Spot Toxic People and Stay Away from Them
We all want to be surrounded by people who uplift us, support us, and bring positivity into our lives. Unfortunately, not everyone we encounter in life is healthy for us to be around.
Some people can be downright toxic, and it’s essential to recognize the signs early and take steps to protect ourselves. In this article, we’ll go over the signs to look out for when it comes to toxic people, and some practical steps you can take to stay away from them.
Signs to Stay Away from Someone
1. Lack of Enjoyment
Have you noticed that you dread spending time with someone? Do you find that you don’t have any fun when you’re together?
If so, it might be time to start reevaluating the relationship. Healthy friendships and relationships should feel enjoyable and fulfilling.
If you consistently experience negative emotions or dread, it could be a sign that the relationship is toxic.
2. Dangerous Behavior
Another red flag to watch out for is dangerous behavior. This can come in many forms, such as anger issues, substance addiction, or putting you in harm’s way.
If someone’s behavior makes it unsafe for you to be around them, it’s time to start distancing yourself.
3. Questionable Friends
They say that you are the company you keep. If the people someone surrounds themselves with are shady, irresponsible, or otherwise problematic, it’s only a matter of time before that behavior starts to influence them.
If you notice that someone is consistently spending time with questionable people, it may be best to avoid that relationship altogether.
4. Self-Esteem Issues
A healthy relationship should never make you feel bad about yourself. If someone is consistently making you feel useless or unattractive, it’s crucial to recognize that this behavior is toxic.
Remember that you deserve to be with people who will lift you up and make you feel good about yourself.
5. Controlling Behavior
Another major sign that a relationship is toxic is when one person tries to control the other. This can take many forms, from dictating what you do, who you talk to, and where you go.
Healthy relationships should be built on trust and mutual respect. If someone doesn’t respect your autonomy and tries to control your life, it’s time to distance yourself from them.
6. Complaining to Friends
Everyone needs to vent about their relationships from time to time, but when it becomes a pattern of constant complaining and frustration, it could be a sign that the relationship is toxic. If someone is consistently using friends as a sounding board for their relationship issues, it may be time to reevaluate the relationship.
7. Disrespecting Boundaries
Respecting someone’s boundaries is paramount in any healthy relationship. When someone consistently crosses physical, emotional, or sexual boundaries, it’s a major warning sign.
Remember that you deserve to be with people who will respect your boundaries and make you feel safe.
8. Fear and Insecurity
It’s natural from time to time to feel uneasy or sad in a relationship. However, if you find yourself constantly afraid for your well-being or replaying arguments in your head, it’s a sign that something is wrong.
Healthy relationships shouldn’t make you feel scared or insecure.
9. Bad Decision Making
Part of being in a relationship is making compromises. However, if you find yourself constantly behaving out of character or not being your best self, it may be time to seek distance from that relationship.
You should never feel like you’re compromising your morals or values for someone else.
10. Gaslighting
Gaslighting is a form of emotional manipulation that can be particularly insidious. It involves causing someone to question reality or doubt their perceptions of what’s happening.
If you feel unsure of yourself or like you’re constantly second-guessing your thoughts when you’re around someone, it could be a sign of gaslighting and a toxic relationship.
11. Instability and Inconsistency
Healthy relationships should be reliable and stable. If someone is consistently flaky, dishonest, or canceling plans, it’s a sign that they may not be the best person to have around.
Remember that you deserve to be with people who respect your time and commitment.
12. Unbalanced Effort
A healthy relationship is built on mutual effort and support. However, if you find yourself doing all the work or putting more time and energy into the relationship than the other person, it could be a warning sign.
Remember that you deserve to be with someone who puts in the same amount of effort as you.
13. Relationship Interference
Jealousy and isolation are signs of a toxic relationship. If someone is consistently trying to ruin your outside relationships or make you feel guilty for spending time with other people, it’s time to recognize the relationship as toxic.
Remember that healthy relationships are built on trust and mutual respect.
14. Listening to Instincts
Finally, trust your gut. If you feel like someone is toxic, it’s important to listen to those feelings.
Sometimes, we can’t articulate why we feel uneasy around someone, but that doesn’t make the feeling any less valid. Remember that you are the expert on your own experience.
How to Stay Away from Toxic People
So, now you know the signs to watch out for when it comes to toxic people. But what can you actually do to stay away from them?
Here are some practical steps you can take.
1. Seek Help and Safety
If you’re in an abusive or otherwise dangerous relationship, it’s essential to seek help and safety. Confide in friends or family, and consider getting a restraining order or other legal protection to keep yourself safe.
2. Pulling Away Gradually
If you’re trying to distance yourself from someone, it’s often easiest to do so gradually. Start by withdrawing slowly, acting busy, and not communicating as frequently.
Over time, the relationship will naturally start to fade away.
3. Cutting Communication
Sometimes, it’s necessary to cut communication entirely with toxic people. This means blocking, deleting, and unfollowing them on social media and removing their phone number from your contacts.
It may be difficult, but remember that you’re doing what’s best for your own mental health and well-being.
4. Avoiding Situations
If you’re trying to stay away from someone, it’s helpful to avoid situations where you might run into them. This means declining invitations, attending functions with friends, and staying away from places where you know they’ll be.
5. Seeking Support
Finally, make sure you have a support system to rely on during difficult times. Surround yourself with people who care about you and will be there for you when you need them.
In conclusion, toxic relationships can be damaging to our mental health and well-being. However, by recognizing the signs and taking practical steps to stay away from toxic people, we can protect ourselves and build strong, healthy relationships with those who uplift and support us.
Remember that you deserve to be surrounded by people who care about you and will lift you up. Trust your instincts and take the steps necessary to protect yourself from toxic people.
In conclusion, it’s crucial to recognize the signs of toxic people to protect ourselves and build healthy relationships. Whether it’s lack of enjoyment, dangerous behavior, or disrespecting boundaries, there are warning signs that we should pay attention to.
However, by taking practical steps like seeking help and safety, gradually pulling away, cutting communication, avoiding situations, and seeking support, we can stay away from toxic people and build strong, positive relationships. Remember that you deserve to be surrounded by people who uplift and support you, and don’t hesitate to distance yourself from those who bring negativity into your life.
