Fighting Feelings: Why Men Suppress Their Emotions
Have you ever met a guy who you knew had feelings for you, but he refused to act on them? Maybe he was always there for you when you needed him, or you caught him stealing furtive glances your way.
But when you tried to get closer, he pulled back, insisting that he wasn’t interested in you “that way.”
If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone. Many women have experienced the frustrating and confusing situation of dealing with a man who is fighting his feelings.
But why do men do this? And how can you tell when a guy is battling his emotions?
Why Men Fight Their Feelings
Societal Construct: Why Men Are Taught to Hide Their Emotions
One reason why men may fight their feelings is because of societal expectations.
From a young age, boys are taught to be tough, to not show vulnerability or emotions. “Real men don’t cry,” we’ve all heard that before.
While this may seem like an outdated concept, it still persists in many cultures and communities. This pressure to conform to masculine stereotypes can lead men to hide their feelings, even if they want to express them.
So when a guy has strong feelings for someone, he may try to suppress them in order to maintain his image of being tough and in control.
Lack of Trust: Why Bad Relationships Can Affect Future Ones
Another reason why a man may fight his feelings is due to past experiences.
If he’s been hurt in a previous relationship, or if someone betrayed his trust, it can make him afraid to open up again. Even if he knows deep down that he has feelings for you, he may resist acting on them because he fears being hurt again.
Lack of Understanding: Why Men Battle with Their Own Emotions
Sometimes, men fight their feelings simply because they don’t understand them. Emotions can be confusing and overwhelming, especially for someone who isn’t used to expressing them.
If a guy has never taken the time to explore his own emotions, he may not even recognize the signs that he’s attracted to someone.
Now that we’ve explored the reasons why men may fight their feelings, let’s take a look at some of the signs that will tell you he’s battling his emotions.
Signs He’s Fighting His Feelings
- Stealing Glances: Does He Keep Looking Your Way? One of the most obvious signs that a guy is fighting his feelings is when he keeps stealing furtive glances your way.
- Intuition: Does Your Gut Tell You He’s Attracted to You? Sometimes, our instincts can tell us when someone is into us, even if they’re trying to play it cool. If your gut tells you that he’s attracted to you, even if he hasn’t said anything, it’s worth paying attention to.
- Loves Spending Time with You: Is He Always Around? One sign that a guy is trying to hide his feelings is when he spends a lot of time with you but insists that it’s not a date.
- Refuses to Admit Hangouts are “Dates”: Does He Keep You Guessing? Similarly, if he avoids labeling your hangouts as “dates,” it’s a sign that he’s fighting his feelings. He might be afraid to commit, or he may just want to keep things casual for the time being.
- Always There for You: Does He Make Time for You? If a guy is fighting his feelings for you, he might go out of his way to be there for you when you need him.
- Cynicism Towards Other Men: Is He Jealous? When a guy is battling his emotions, he might become protective or possessive towards you. He might act jealous when you talk to other men, or be overly critical of guys you date.
- Hurt When You Don’t Take His Advice: Does He Get Disappointed When You Don’t Listen? If a guy is fighting his feelings for you but still cares about you deeply, he might get hurt or disappointed when you don’t take his advice.
- Tries to Make You Jealous: Is He Flirting with Other Girls? One sign that a guy is fighting his feelings is when he tries to make you jealous by flirting with other girls. He might be trying to get a reaction out of you, or he might be trying to test your feelings for him.
- Follows You on Social Media: Is He Stalking You? If he follows you on social media but doesn’t interact with your posts or messages, it’s a sign that he’s interested in you but doesn’t want to come on too strong.
- Understands You Like a Lover Would: Does He Know You Inside and Out? If a guy is battling his emotions, he might still be able to understand you like a lover would. He’ll pick up on the small details of your life, and he’ll know what makes you tick.
- Friends Think You’re Together: Are There Rumors Flying Around? If your friends think that you’re together, even if you’re not officially dating, it’s a sign that there’s something there.
- Becomes Self-Conscious Around You: Does He Get Nervous or Awkward? When a guy is fighting his feelings, he might become self-conscious around you. He might get nervous or awkward, or he might struggle to find the right words to say.
- Becomes Shy Around You: Is He Feeling Shy and Introverted? Similarly, he might become shy and introverted around you.
- Tries to Know the Real You: Is He Interested in Everything About You? If a guy is fighting his feelings, he might try to get to know the real you on a deeper level. He’ll be interested in your hopes, fears, and dreams, and will want to connect with you on a personal level.
- Justifies Himself to You: Is He Always Explaining Himself? Finally, if a guy is fighting his feelings, he might find himself justifying his actions and decisions to you.
He’ll want to make sure that you understand where he’s coming from, even if he’s not ready to tell you how he really feels.
Conclusion: How to Tell If a Guy Is Fighting His Feelings for You
In conclusion, there are many signs that a guy is fighting his feelings for you, from stealing glances to becoming self-conscious around you. The key is to look for patterns of behavior and trust your intuition when it comes to understanding his emotions.
While it can be frustrating to deal with a guy who’s not ready to commit, it’s important to be patient and give him space to work through his emotions. With time, he may open up and reveal his true feelings, or he may decide that you’re not the right person for him.
Either way, it’s important to listen to your own feelings and needs, and to look for a partner who is emotionally available and ready to commit to a relationship with you.
How to Handle a Guy Fighting His Feelings for You
If you’ve identified that a guy is fighting his feelings for you, it’s important to handle the situation with care and patience. Here are some strategies you can use to navigate the situation and decide how to move forward.
Have an Honest Conversation About It
One of the best ways to handle the situation is to have an honest conversation with the guy about how you both feel. Be clear about your own emotions, but also be receptive to what he has to say.
Try to create a safe and non-judgmental atmosphere where you can both express yourselves openly and honestly. During the conversation, it’s important to listen carefully to what he’s saying and how he’s feeling.
If he’s expressing doubts or hesitations, try to understand where he’s coming from. If he’s not ready to commit, it might not be about you specifically, but rather about his own personal journey.
Ask a Mutual Friend to Introduce You
If you’re not sure about how to approach the guy directly, you could consider asking a mutual friend to introduce you. This can help to break the ice and create an environment where you can get to know each other without any pressure.
A mutual friend can also help to gauge whether the guy might be interested in you or not. They might have insights into his personality or past relationships that could give you a better understanding of where he’s coming from.
Ask Him Out Yourself
If you’re feeling confident and bold, you could also consider asking the guy out yourself. This can show him that you’re interested and willing to take charge.
However, it’s important to be respectful of any boundaries he might have and to be clear about your intentions. When you ask him out, be specific about the activity you have in mind.
You could suggest something casual, like grabbing coffee or taking a walk, or something more formal, like a dinner date. Try to create an environment that’s comfortable for both of you.
Let Him Know You’re Open to Something with Him
Finally, one of the best ways to handle the situation is to let the guy know that you’re open to the possibility of something more with him. This can help to remove some of the pressure and show him that you’re willing to take things slow.
When you express your openness to him, be clear about what you’re looking for. Are you interested in a committed relationship, or are you open to something more casual?
Be honest and upfront, but also be understanding of his own emotions and needs.
Conclusion
Dealing with a guy who is fighting his feelings can be a challenge, but with patience and communication, it’s possible to navigate the situation successfully. Whether you decide to have an honest conversation, ask him out yourself, or let him know you’re open to something more, the key is to stay true to your own emotions and needs.
Finally, always keep in mind that waiting for someone to be ready or change can be an emotional drain and time-consuming, so always prioritize your own wellbeing.
In conclusion, understanding the reasons why men may fight their feelings and the signs that they’re struggling with attraction can help women navigate these situations better.
Societal constructs, lack of trust, and confusion over their own emotions can all contribute to a guy’s reluctance to act on his feelings. However, by noticing the signs and communicating honestly, women can help to create a safe and non-judgmental space that allows guys to express themselves.
Whether you choose to ask a mutual friend for an introduction or take the initiative and ask him out yourself, the key is to keep open lines of communication and remain true to your own emotions and needs. By doing so, you’ll be better equipped to handle these situations with patience and grace, and find a partner who is emotionally available and ready to commit.
