Coping with Forbidden Love: Understanding Why We Fall for Others and How to Save Your Marriage


Falling in Love with Someone Outside of Marriage: Coping and Understanding

Have you ever experienced falling in love with someone you shouldn’t have? Have you ever found yourself fantasizing about someone who’s not your spouse?

Don’t worry! You are not alone. Humans are imperfect beings with imperfections, and falling in love with someone outside of marriage is one of the most common imperfections that we encounter.

In this article, we’ll dive into reasons why people fall in love with someone outside of marriage and how to cope with these feelings.

Reasons Why People Fall in Love with Someone Outside of Marriage

1. Human Imperfection – Frailty and Imperfection

Being human means we are imperfect.

We all make mistakes, and sometimes those mistakes include falling in love with someone else while still being married. Nobody is perfect, and nobody is immune to the attraction and affection of others, especially when they show us affection that we don’t receive from our spouse.

2. Feeling Stuck with the Wrong Person – Regret and Wrong Decision

Sometimes people feel stuck with the wrong partner.

They may have made a decision to be with someone that they later regret. That regret can lead one to seek affection elsewhere.

3. Feeling Invisible – Taken for Granted and Lack of Appreciation

It’s natural to feel taken for granted or neglected in your marriage, especially if your partner neglects to show you love or appreciation in the way that you need it.

When someone outside of your marriage shows you interest and affection, it’s tempting to fall under their spell.

4. Happiness Leaving the Marriage – Dull, Routine, Lack of Excitement

Marriages that have become dull and routine may feel like a trap, and cause one to seek excitement and adventure outside of the marriage.

5. Nostalgia for Early Relationship Days – Honeymoon Phase, Excitement, Adrenaline

Sometimes people fall in love with someone outside of marriage because they long for the excitement and adrenaline of the early days of their relationship. They may feel nostalgic for the honeymoon phase that their marriage has lost.

6. Lack of Real Love – Lust, Passion, Infatuation, No Emotional Bond

Some individuals find themselves in a loveless marriage, with no emotional bond with their partner.

They may seek out love, passion, and lust outside of the marriage.

7. Boredom – Routine, No Newness, No Excitement

Being bored in your marriage can lead to seeking out new and exciting relationships. When life has become monotonous, adventure can be very tempting.

8. Emotional Vulnerability – Depression, Hope on Fragile Foundations

Emotional vulnerability can lead to infidelity.

When going through a hard time in life, it’s easy to look outward for support and love. However, when it’s not your spouse you’re turning to, it can lead to a very complicated situation.

Coping with Falling in Love While Married

If you find yourself in a situation where you’ve fallen in love with someone outside of your marriage, it’s important to consider the consequences of your actions. You’ve made a commitment to be with your spouse, and cheating on them can severely damage your union.

Forgiving yourself is another key aspect of coping with extramarital attraction. Know that you’re not perfect, and that anyone can find themselves in a situation where they’ve fallen in love with someone outside of their marriage.

You’re only human, and humans make mistakes. Building an attitude of gratitude can also help you cope with these feelings.

Try focusing on the positive in your life and your current relationship with your spouse. Remind yourself what you love about them, and the reasons why you made a commitment to be with them.

Lastly, remember that love is about giving as well as receiving. The love you give to your spouse should be mutual.

Focus on investing in your marriage, and work on building a deeper emotional connection with your spouse.

Final Thoughts

Remember: humans are imperfect beings. Falling in love with someone outside of marriage can happen to anyone, and it’s important to understand the reasons behind these feelings.

Coping with these feelings includes considering the consequences, forgiving yourself, building an attitude of gratitude, and investing in your marriage. Being aware and taking proactive steps towards a better marriage can help you find the happiness and satisfaction you were seeking outside of your union.

In conclusion, falling in love with someone outside of marriage is a common experience that many people have faced. Understanding why it happens and how to cope with these feelings is essential for the success of any committed relationship.

Remembering the commitment you have made to your spouse, forgiving yourself, focusing on the positive aspects of your current relationship, and investing in your marriage are all strategies that can help you overcome these challenges. In the end, it’s important to remember that love isn’t just about receiving, but also about giving.

By approaching your marriage with this perspective, you can cultivate a strong connection with your spouse and build a solid foundation for a lasting relationship.

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