What Drives a Narcissist Insane?
Are you dealing with a narcissist in your life, and struggling to understand their behavior? Whether it’s a friend, family member, or coworker, it can be frustrating and exhausting to deal with a person who seems obsessed with themselves and their own desires.
In this article, we explore what drives a narcissist insane, and how you can avoid the behaviors that trigger their wrath.
What Drives a Narcissist Insane?
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Silent Treatment:
Ignoring a narcissist can be an effective way to frustrate them, as they crave attention and validation.
When you stop giving them the reaction they seek, they may lash out in narcissistic rage, trying to escalate the situation until they get the response they want. If someone in your life is a narcissist, giving them the silent treatment may be a way to put up healthy boundaries and protect your own well-being.
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Losing Control:
Narcissists often have a need for control, and can become angry and aggressive when they feel like they’re losing it.
Disobeying their orders or asserting your own independence can be a trigger for a narcissist. If you’re dealing with a controlling narcissist, it’s important to assert your own boundaries and stand up for yourself, even if it means facing their anger.
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Taking Criticism:
Narcissists have fragile egos and may struggle to take any kind of criticism, even if it’s constructive or meant to help them improve.
Criticizing a narcissist can cause them to feel narcissistic injury, leading to defensiveness or even explosive rage. When offering feedback to a narcissist, it’s important to be gentle but firm.
You may also need to be prepared for them to reject the feedback outright.
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Not Being the Center of Attention:
Narcissists crave validation and admiration, and any perceived threat to their status as the center of attention can cause them to become jealous or angry.
If you’ve ever been in a situation with a narcissist where they’re not getting enough attention, you may have seen them try to draw attention back to themselves by acting out or making exaggerated claims about their accomplishments.
In some cases, giving a narcissist attention and validation may be necessary in order to defuse a situation.
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Ordinary Treatment:
Narcissists have a sense of self-importance and may expect VIP treatment wherever they go. When they don’t get the special treatment they think they deserve, they may become irritable or disengaged.
In some cases, treating a narcissist like an ordinary person may be a way to prevent them from becoming agitated or hostile.
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Public Embarrassment:
Narcissists often feel a need to be in control of their public image, and any perceived threat to their self-image can be deeply unsettling.
When confronted with public embarrassment, a narcissist may resort to gaslighting, criticizing, or humiliating others in order to shift the focus away from them.
If you find yourself in a situation where a narcissist is trying to publicly embarrass you, it’s important to remain calm and assertive, while recognizing that their behavior is not your fault.
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Not Getting Their Own Way:
Narcissists have a sense of superiority over others, and may struggle to accept it when other people won’t follow their lead or give them their desired outcome.
When they don’t get their way, they may lash out in narcissistic rage, trying to regain control of the situation.
If you find yourself in a power struggle with a narcissist, it’s important to stand up for your own needs and boundaries, while recognizing that their behavior is ultimately about their own need for control.
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Being Called Out for Their Insecurities:
Narcissists often hide behind a mask of confidence and self-assuredness, but deep down they may struggle with insecurities and self-doubt.
When confronted with these insecurities whether through a backhanded compliment or outright mockery a narcissist may become defensive or aggressive.
If you find yourself in a situation where a narcissist is experiencing narcissistic injury, it’s important to remain empathetic but firm, while recognizing that their behavior is driven by their own need to protect their image.
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Going No Contact:
If you’re dealing with a narcissist who is consistently toxic or abusive, going no contact cutting them out of your life entirely may be the best option for you.
Narcissists hate being ignored or cast aside, and may lash out in revenge if they sense that their control over you is slipping.
If you choose to go no contact, it’s important to have a plan in place for protecting yourself and staying safe.
Infuriating a Narcissist:
While it’s important to avoid the behaviors that trigger a narcissist‘s anger and aggression, it can also be empowering to know that there are certain things you can do to frustrate them.
Here are a few behaviors that may infuriate a narcissist:
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Not Being Under the Spotlight:
Narcissists crave attention and validation, and not getting it can be frustrating and infuriating for them.
If you want to irritate a narcissist, try diverting the focus away from them and onto something else.
When they’re not getting the attention they crave, they may lash out in an attempt to regain control of the situation.
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Not Getting the Validation They Crave:
Narcissists thrive on praise and admiration, so any perceived threat to their sense of superiority such as being compared to someone who is better than them can be deeply unsettling.
If you want to upset a narcissist, try pointing out their flaws and shortcomings.
They may become defensive or outright angry, but it’s important to remember that their behavior is ultimately about their own insecurities.
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Losing Control:
As we mentioned earlier, narcissists need to feel in control of their environment and the people around them.
Whether it’s asserting your own independence or disobeying their orders, any behavior that threatens their sense of control can be a trigger for narcissistic rage.
If you want to irritate a narcissist, try taking actions that deliberately subvert their authority or disrupt their plans.
Conclusion:
Dealing with a narcissist can be exhausting and frustrating, but understanding what drives them and how to avoid triggering their wrath can help you maintain healthy boundaries and protect your own well-being.
Remember that their behavior is ultimately about their own needs and insecurities, and try to focus on your own well-being and happiness, rather than trying to constantly appease them.
Whether it’s going no contact or finding ways to irritate them, remember that you have the power to protect yourself and maintain control over your own life.
Making a Narcissist Miserable:
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Pointing Out Flaws:
Narcissists often have an inflated sense of self-importance and may struggle with feelings of inadequacy or insecurity.
Pointing out their flaws whether it’s their physical appearance, their abilities, or their behavior can be an effective way to make them feel miserable and inferior.
Keep in mind, however, that doing so may also provoke their anger and aggression, so it’s important to be prepared to protect yourself.
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Comparing Them Unfavorably:
Narcissists thrive on the idea that they’re superior to others, so any behavior or comment that threatens this belief can be incredibly frustrating and upsetting for them.
If you want to make a narcissist miserable, try comparing them unfavorably to someone else whether it’s a colleague, a friend, or someone in the public eye.
They may become defensive or even hostile, but it’s important to remember that their behavior is ultimately driven by their own feelings of insecurity and inferiority.
Phrases to Disarm a Narcissist:
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Respectful Communication:
When dealing with a narcissist, it’s important to maintain a tone of respectful communication.
This means avoiding aggressive or confrontational language, and instead approaching them in a calm and assertive manner.
By doing so, you can help de-escalate situations and prevent them from becoming more volatile.
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Rejecting Brainwashing:
Narcissists may try to manipulate or brainwash others in order to get their way or maintain control over them.
By rejecting their manipulative tactics and standing firm in your own truth, you can disarm them and prevent them from continuing their harmful behavior.
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Agreeing to Disagree:
Narcissists may thrive on conflict and drama, but by agreeing to disagree and finding common ground where possible, you can help de-escalate difficult situations.
This means acknowledging their perspective while also standing firm in your own beliefs and values.
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Refusing Responsibility for Emotions:
Narcissists may try to guilt or manipulate others by claiming that their negative emotions are the result of someone else’s behavior.
By refusing to take responsibility for their emotions and staying focused on your own boundaries and needs, you can help protect your own mental and emotional health.
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Suggesting Professional Help:
Narcissistic behavior is often rooted in underlying mental health issues, such as personality disorders or traumatic experiences.
By suggesting that the narcissist seeks professional help from a therapist or mental health provider, you may be able to help them address the root causes of their behavior and start on a path towards healing.
Conclusion:
Dealing with a narcissist can be incredibly challenging, but it’s important to remember that their behavior is ultimately driven by their own insecurities and mental health issues.
By arming yourself with strategies to make them miserable and phrases to disarm them, you can protect your own mental and emotional health while also trying to help them seek the help they need.
Remember to always prioritize your own well-being and safety, and don’t hesitate to reach out for support if you need it.
In conclusion, dealing with a narcissist can be overwhelming and often difficult to navigate.
However, by understanding what drives their behavior and utilizing strategies such as avoiding their triggers and knowing how to communicate effectively, you can take control of interactions with them while maintaining your well-being.
Remember that their behavior is often rooted in their own insecurities, and while it’s important to set healthy boundaries, it’s also essential to approach them with empathy and compassion.
By empowering yourself with the knowledge and tools to deal with a narcissist, you can both protect yourself and help them seek the professional help they may need to heal and overcome their challenges.